Okuqukethwe
Ukucindezeleka kubizwa ngokuthi imbangela yezinkinga zempilo, kodwa akunakwenzeka ukwenza ngaphandle kwakho. Ngenxa yalokhu kusabela komzimba ezimweni ezingezona ezijwayelekile, okhokho bethu abakude bakwazi ukusinda ezimweni ezinzima, futhi manje umsebenzi walo awushintshile kakhulu. Isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo uSherry Campbell ukholelwa ukuthi ukucindezeleka kunezinto eziningi eziwusizo: kusiza ukujwayela izinguquko, ukubhekana nobunzima nokwenza izinqumo ezifanele. Nokho, okuningi kuncike kithi.
Abaningi bethu abazi ukuthi bangabhekana kanjani nokucindezeleka, ngoba sivame ukukhomba ukuthi kwenzeka ngenxa yezimo zangaphandle kuphela. Lokhu kuyiqiniso ngokwengxenye, izici zokucindezeleka ngokuvamile zingaphandle kwendawo yethonya lethu, kodwa lesi akusona isizathu esiyinhloko. Eqinisweni, umthombo wokucindezeleka ungaphakathi kithi. Ukukhohlwa ngalokhu, sidlulisela imizwa kumuntu noma kokuthile bese siqala ukufuna umuntu esingamsola.
Kodwa njengoba sikwazi kalula ukusakaza okubi, kusho ukuthi singakwazi ukushintshela kokuhle. Ukucindezeleka kunganqotshwa futhi kufakwe ezindleleni ezakhayo. Kulokhu, uba amandla aqhuba impumelelo. Yebo, lesi akusona isimo esihle kakhulu, kodwa kufanelekile ukufuna izinzuzo kuso.
INDLELA UKUQINISEKA KUSIZO NGAYO
1.Ithuthukisa ikhono lokuzihlola
Ukuze uzuze ekucindezelekeni, kubalulekile ukukubheka njengento engenakugwenywa, ingxenye yefilosofi yokuphila, noma isici esibalulekile sokukhula kochwepheshe. Uma uyeka ukulinda ukuthi izinkathazo zehle futhi ufunde ukuphila nakho, amehlo akho avuleka ngokoqobo. Sithola ukuthi lapho singenamandla ngokwanele nokuthi singakulungisa kanjani.
Ukucindezeleka njalo kuveza ubuthakathaka bethu noma kubonisa lapho sintula khona ulwazi nolwazi. Lapho siqaphela ubuthakathaka bethu, ukuqonda okucacile kwalokho okudingeka kuthuthukiswe kufika.
2. Ikwenza ucabange ngendlela yokudala
Umthombo wokucindezeleka yizenzakalo ezingalindelekile. Njengoba singathanda ukuthi yonke into ihambe ngokwesimo esinqunyiwe, ngeke sikwazi ukwenza ngaphandle kokusonteka okungalindelekile. Esimweni sokucindezeleka, ngokuvamile sifuna ukulawula yonke into, kodwa ungakwazi ukubuka impilo ngamehlo omculi. Esikhundleni sokulwa nokuthi ungatholaphi imali eyengeziwe, kungcono ukugxila ekwakheni umsebenzi ophumelelayo.
Eqinisweni, ukucindezeleka kusigcina ezinzwaneni zethu. Akunakwenzeka ukuba uchwepheshe embonini yakho ngaphandle kokuzama ukuba ngaphambi kwawo wonke umuntu. Futhi lokhu kusho ukucabanga ngendlela ehlakaniphile, ukweqa izindinganiso ezamukelwa ngokuvamile futhi ungesabi ukuzifaka engozini. Ukunyakaziswa kobunzima obuzumayo kukhulula i-adrenaline. Kukhona amandla angadluliselwa emibonweni emisha, ukusebenza kanzima kanye nokuzuza imiphumela ephezulu.
3. Isiza ukubeka phambili
Impumelelo ihlobene ngokuqondile nezinto ezibalulekile. Lapho sibhekene nokukhetha, impendulo yethu ekucindezelekeni isitshela ukuthi yini edinga ukunakwa kakhulu nokuthi yini engahlehliswa kuze kube kamuva. Kuyafaneleka ukuhlonza imisebenzi ebaluleke kakhulu futhi uthathe ukuqaliswa kwayo, njengoba kubonakala ukuzethemba. Ngokushesha lapho sibhekana nesimo esiphuthumayo esicindezelayo, kufika impumuzo futhi, okubaluleke kakhulu, umuzwa wokwaneliseka okujulile ufika: konke kuphumelele!
4.Ivula amathuba amasha
Ukucindezeleka kubonisa ukuthi sibhekene nobunzima. Lokhu kusho ukuthi kufanele ubhekane nenselele, ushintshe indlela, ufunde okuthile, wenze ngokwehlukile, unqobe ukwesaba ukwehluleka, futhi udale ithuba elisha. Yebo, izinkinga zibangela ukucindezeleka, kodwa kungabonakala njengembangi. Okwethu ukukhetha: ukuzinikela noma ukunqoba. Kulabo abafuna amathuba, izindlela ezintsha ziyavuleka.
5.Yenyusa izinga lobuhlakani
Ukucindezeleka kufakazelwe ukuthuthukisa ukusebenza kwengqondo futhi kuthuthukise izici ezithile zokucabanga kwethu. Impendulo yemvelo yokulwa-noma-indiza yenza ama-neurotransmitter athile asebenze asenza ukuthi sigxile khona manjalo emisebenzini ephuthumayo.
Lapho singaphansi kwengcindezi, asigcini nje ngokunaka ngokweqile, kodwa futhi sibonisa amakhono engqondo avelele. Inkumbulo yethu ikhiqiza imininingwane nemicimbi ngokushesha, okubaluleke kakhulu ezimeni ezibucayi lapho kudingeka khona ulwazi namakhono okuxazulula izinkinga.
6. Ihlala ilungile
Umhlabathi ovunde kakhulu wokuthuthukiswa kolwazi, amakhono kanye namakhono ubunzima kanye nemisebenzi engajwayelekile. Impumelelo ingumzabalazo, ayikho enye indlela. Kulabo abanqotshwa ukwehluleka, injabulo yokunqoba ayifinyeleleki.
Lapho siphinda sikwazile ukudlula emgwaqeni esingaziwa, sizizwa sijabule. Izithiyo kufanele zibe umthombo wogqozi kithi, hhayi ukuphelelwa ithemba. Awukho umgomo omkhulu ofinyelelwa ngaphandle komzamo nokusebenza kanzima.
7. Iphakamisa amasu ayimpumelelo
Lapho sinqotshwa ukungabaza nokukhathazeka, ukucindezeleka kubonisa indlela yokuphuma ezimweni ezidida kakhulu. Ngaphansi kwengcindezi yalo, senza njengakuqala, ngoba sikulungele ukwenza konke okusemandleni ukuqeda lo mthwalo.
Uma senza ngokuxhamazela, uvalo luyakhula futhi kuphakama izinkinga ezengeziwe. Ukuze uguqule ukucindezeleka ube ngumngane, udinga ukunciphisa kancane futhi ucabange isu elizokuvumela ukuba ukhulule ukubamba futhi uqhubekele phambili. Lapho sihlaziya amaphutha ethu ngokucophelela futhi sihlela ezinye izinyathelo, yilapho sihlangabezana nezinselele ezintsha ngokuzethemba.
8. Iholela kubantu abalungile
Uma ukucindezeleka kugubuzele ikhanda lakho, lesi yisikhathi sokufuna usizo, ukwesekwa kanye nezeluleko. Abantu abaphumelelayo bahlale bekulungele ukubambisana. Abalokothi bazibheke njengabahlakaniphe kunawo wonke umuntu emhlabeni. Uma sivuma ukuthi asikwazi entweni ethile futhi sicela usizo, sithola okungaphezu kwesixazululo esisheshayo nesisebenzayo senkinga. Abantu abasizungezile babelana nathi ngolwazi lwabo, futhi lesi yisipho esiyigugu. Ngaphezu kwalokho, uma sinquma ukutshela ukuthi sisenkingeni, asikho engozini yokutubeka ngokomzwelo.
9. Uthuthukisa ukucabanga okuhle
Asikho isithiyo esikhulu sokuphumelela kunokucindezeleka okubangelwa izimo ezicindezelayo. Uma sifuna ukuzuza ekucindezelekeni, kudingeka sisebenzise izimpawu zayo njengesikhumbuzo sokuthi sekuyisikhathi sokuvula ukucabanga okuhle ngokushesha. Sizokhala uma sinesikhathi esikhululekile.
Isimo sethu sengqondo ngezenzakalo - ezinhle noma ezimbi - kuncike kithi ngokwethu. Imicabango edabukisayo yokwehlulwa iyindlela yokuya ndawo. Ngakho-ke, njengoba sesizwile indlela yokucindezeleka, kufanele sisebenze ngokushesha zonke izimo zengqondo ezinhle futhi sizame ukuthola indlela yokuphuma esimweni esinzima.
Mayelana Nombhali: USherry Campbell ungudokotela wezengqondo, isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo, kanye nombhali wencwadi ethi Zithande: Ubuciko Bokuba Nguwe, Ifomula Yempumelelo: Indlela Eya Emihleni Engokomzwelo.