Okuqukethwe
Abazali nothisha bakhathazekile ngokuthi izingane zikhulela endaweni lapho ubulili bunquma yonke into: impumelelo, injabulo, ingcebo enhle. Yiziphi izinsongo ezenziwa ucansi ngaphambi kwesikhathi futhi yini abazali okufanele bayenze?
Namuhla, izingane kanye nentsha ingakwazi ukufinyelela kalula izithombe zobulili ezingcolile, futhi i-Instagram (inhlangano eyeqisayo evinjelwe eRussia) ngamakhono ayo okubuyisela kabusha yenza abantu abaningi bazizwe benamahloni ngomzimba wabo "ongaphelele".
“Ukuziphatha ngokocansi kusencane kuthinta ikakhulukazi amantombazane namantombazane amancane, kusho umelaphi womndeni uCatherine McCall. “Izithombe zabesifazane ezizungeza intombazane ziba yisibonelo esihle lapho ifunda khona ukuziphatha, ukuxhumana nokwakha ubuntu bayo. Uma esemncane intombazane ifunde ukuphatha owesifazane njengento efiswayo, angase abe nezinkinga zokuzethemba, ukwanda kokukhathazeka, ukuphazamiseka kokudla kanye nokulutha kungase kuthuthuke.
"Ngesaba ukuthumela izithombe zami, angiphelele"
Ngo-2006, i-American Psychological Association yakha ithimba elizohlola inkinga yocansi ezinganeni.
Ngokusekelwe emiphumeleni yomsebenzi wakhe, izazi zokusebenza kwengqondo ziye zakha izici ezine ezihlukanisa ukuya ocansini nombono onempilo wocansi1:
ukubaluleka komuntu kunqunywa kuphela indlela abukeka ngayo nendlela aziphatha ngayo;
ukukhanga kwangaphandle kuhlotshaniswa nobulili, nobulili obunenjabulo nempumelelo;
umuntu uthathwa njengento yocansi, hhayi njengomuntu ozimele onelungelo lokuzikhethela;
ubulili njengesici esiyinhloko sempumelelo sibekwe ngobudlova emithonjeni yezindaba kanye nemvelo yengane.
“Lapho ngiya ku-Facebook (inhlangano eyeqisayo evinjelwe eRussia), into yokuqala engiyibonayo yizithombe zabantu engibaziyo,” kusho uLiza oneminyaka engu-15 ubudala.. - Ngaphansi kokuhle kakhulu kwabo, abantu bashiya amakhulu okuthandwa. Ngesaba ukuthumela izithombe zami ngoba kimi kubonakala sengathi kufanele ngibe mncane, nginesikhumba esihle esifanayo nezici ezivamile. Yebo, baphinde banginikeze ukuthandwa, kodwa okuncane - bese ngiqala ukucabanga ukuthi labo abavele babuke futhi bahambe bacabangani. Kubi!»
Zikhula ngokushesha kakhulu
"Impilo ihamba ngokushesha kakhulu futhi samukela ubuchwepheshe ngaphambi kokuba siqaphele ukuthi izishintsha kanjani izimpilo zethu," kuchaza uReg Baily, inhloko yoMkhandlu Womama wase-UK. Uma ingane ithumela isithombe kumngane noma isihlanganyela esidlangalaleni, ayiqapheli ngaso sonke isikhathi ukuthi kungaba yini imiphumela.”
Ngokusho kwakhe, abazali bavame ukukhetha ukungazinaki lezi zihloko. Kwesinye isikhathi ubuchwepheshe uqobo buba yindlela yokubalekela izingxoxo ezingajwayelekile. Kodwa lokhu kuqinisa kuphela ukuhlukaniswa kwezingane, kuzishiya zibhekana nokwesaba nokukhathazeka kwazo zodwa. Kungani lokhu kwenzeka? Kuvelaphi lokhu kuxaka?
Ngo-2015, ingosi yolwazi lwabazali yaseBrithani iNetmums yenza ucwaningo oluthola:
U-89% wabazali abasha bakholelwa ukuthi izingane zabo zikhula ngokushesha kakhulu - okungenani ngokushesha okukhulu kunabo.
“Abazali badidekile, abazi ukuthi bakhulume kanjani nezingane ezibhekana nakho okuhluke kangaka kokwazo,” kuphetha uSiobhan Freegard, umsunguli weNetmums. Futhi banesizathu. Ngokusho kokuvota, engxenyeni yabazali, into ebaluleke kakhulu kumuntu ukubukeka okuhle.
isihlungi semvelo
Abantu abadala bayalubona usongo, kodwa akukho lutho abangakwenza ngalo. Bahluleka wukuthola umsuka wenkinga ngoba ngempela awukho umthombo owodwa. Kunengxube eqhumayo yokukhangisa, imikhiqizo yemidiya kanye nobudlelwano kontanga. Konke lokhu kuyamdida ingane, kumphoqe ukuthi ahlale ezibuza: yini okufanele uyenze futhi uzizwe ukuze ube umuntu omdala? Ukuzethemba kwakhe kuhlala kuhlaselwa zinhlangothi zonke.” Ingabe lokhu kuhlasela kungagwenywa?
Uma ingane ilayisha isithombe sayo emphakathini, ayiqapheli ngaso sonke isikhathi ukuthi imiphumela ingaba yini
“Kukhona isihlungi semvelo esihluza ulwazi olubi — lokhu ukuzinza kwemizwa, U-Reg Bailey uthi “Izingane eziyaziyo imiphumela yezenzo zazo zingakwazi ukwenza izinqumo ezizimele.” Ithimba le-University of Pennsylvania (USA) lithole ukuthi akulungile ukuvikela ingane kakhulu kulokho okungamlimaza - kulokhu, ngeke nje ahlakulele "ukungavikeleki" kwemvelo2.
Isu elingcono, ngokusho kwababhali, liyingozi elawulwayo: makahlole umhlaba, kuhlanganise nezwe le-intanethi, kodwa amfundise ukubuza imibuzo futhi abelane ngemicabango nemizwa yakhe. “Umsebenzi wabazali awukona ukwesabisa ingane ngezithombe zezwe elingcolile “labantu abadala,” kodwa ukuhlanganyela okuhlangenwe nakho kwabo nokuxoxa ngezinkinga ezinzima ndawonye.”
1 Ukuze uthole ulwazi olwengeziwe, bheka iwebhusayithi ye-American Psychological Association apa.org/pi/women/programs/girls/report.aspx.
2 P. Wisniewski, et al. "Ingqungquthela ye-ACM Yezinto Zomuntu Ezinhlelweni Zekhompyutha", ngo-2016.