"Oblomov Syndrome": indlela yokunqoba i-passivity

Mhlawumbe ukucindezela kwezimo kwakunamandla kakhulu. Mhlawumbe ngesinye isikhathi waba nomuzwa wokuthi umhlaba wonke ukujikele. Awuwatholi amandla okulwa futhi unquma ukuthi ungabe usagxumela ngaphezu kwekhanda lakho. Okwedlule kubuhlungu, ikusasa liyethusa. Uzama ukubambezela phambili kwakhe. Okungcono, ungenzi lutho ukuze kungabi kubi nakakhulu.

Ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, kuba nzima nakakhulu kuwe ukwenza izinto ezijwayelekile kakhulu. Abanye babeka imigomo, izithakazelo, futhi ekugcineni ukuphila kuwe. Kodwa impilo yakho idlula kuwe, futhi uqala ukuziqinisekisa: mhlawumbe lokhu akukubi. Kodwa akukho ukujabula nokushaqeka.

Uma unamandla futhi uzethemba, uziphatha ngendlela ehlukile. Unomdlandla, uyathandeka futhi uhlakaniphile. I-Passivity iyisici esifundiwe futhi kungasetshenzwa ngayo. Nansi eminye imibono ebalulekile ukusiza ukwenza umehluko.

1. Hlola ukwesaba kwakho

Lapho sigwema ukwenza okuthile, ukwesaba kuvame ukubangela—ukwesaba ukwehluleka, ukungaphili ngokuvumelana nalokho esikulindele nokwabanye, ukuzenza sibukeke siyiziwula. Lapho ukwesaba kukhula kube ukukhathazeka, kuba nzima ngathi ukusebenza nakho.

Zama ukukhomba izimo ezithile lapho ukwesaba kwakho kuzibonakalisa khona. Ixhumene nani? Kwenzeka ngasiphi isikhathi? Ukurekhoda okuphawulile kudayari kuzokusiza ukuthi ukwazi okwengeziwe ngezipiliyoni zakho futhi uthole umuzwa wokulawula isimo sakho.

2. Shintsha imikhuba yakho

Ukuthambekela kokuhlala sigwema ukwenza izinqumo ezibalulekile ngokuhamba kwesikhathi kugxilile kakhulu ohlelweni lwethu lwansuku zonke, izenzo zethu zansuku zonke, umbono wethu wezwe, kangangokuthi ukuhlukana nawo kufana nokuthuthela kwelinye izwe.

Kungaba nzima ukuhlela kabusha yonke inqubo ngesikhathi esisodwa. Ngakho-ke, kungcono ukwethula izinguquko kancane kancane. Hlela ukuya enkulumweni yeningi kule mpelasonto, thatha uhambo epaki ngaphambi komsebenzi, xoxa nomakhelwane wakho. Amancane "ama-foreys" emhlabeni wangaphandle azokwenza kube seduze futhi kuphephe kuwe.

3. Bhala Amandla Akho

Esimeni sokungenzi lutho, sinqotshwa kalula ukudangala: zonke izinsuku esiphila kuzo zengeza izizathu ezengeziwe zokuzigxeka. Esikhundleni sokuhlambalaza, zama ukugxila emandleni akho. Kungase kubonakale kuwe ukuthi zonke izimpumelelo zakho ziyinhlekisa futhi abanye bazokudalula ngokushesha.

Cela abangani nabantu obaziyo ukuthi bakuchaze futhi basho ukuthi yini abayithandayo ngawe — ukuze ukwazi ukuzihlola ngendlela efanele. Uma usulwenzile uhlu lwakho, cabanga ukuthi ungaluthuthukisa kanjani. Yenza ngesisekelo sezisusa zangaphakathi, hhayi ngokuphendula okulindelwe omunye umuntu kanye "nombono womphakathi".

4. Funda ukuthi "cha"

Okuxakayo ukuthi, yileli gama lapho ukuqwashisa kuqala khona. I-passivity iwukugwema imizwa engathandeki nezenzo ezingase zibangele. Ngokuvamile, ukungenzi lutho kuba umphumela womthwalo omningi, lapho izibopho ezenziwe zinesisindo esikhulu futhi sizibalekela. Ngokufunda ukwenqaba, usendleleni yokwethembeka kuwena nakwabanye futhi ulawule izinqumo zakho.

5. Ngenisa ubungozi obulawulekayo empilweni yakho

Isizathu esivamile sokwehluleka kwalabo abazama ukubhekana nokunganaki ukubukelwa phansi kwamakhono abo. Lapho siphuma «lair» yethu sisengozini. Umzamo wokunqoba ngokungafanele wonke amacala anqwabelene noma ukuthatha izibopho zomhlaba wonke kungaholela emzuliswaneni omusha wokuzehlisa kanye nokudumala okukhulu kakhulu esikhathini esizayo.

Inketho engcono kakhulu ukusunduza kancane kancane imingcele yendawo yakho yokunethezeka. Amandla okuzimisela ayaqeqesheka, kodwa njengemisipha, kubalulekile ukushintshanisa phakathi kokuzivocavoca nokuphumula.

6. Hlela imisebenzi yakho

Umuzwa wempumelelo uyakhuthaza. Ikakhulukazi uma leyo mpumelelo ingalinganiswa noma imelelwe ngokubuka. Ngakho-ke, kungcono ukuzibekela umgomo owodwa bese uqhubeka uye kuwo kunokuba uhlakazeke kumaphrojekthi ambalwa.

Bhala phansi zonke izigaba, uzihlukanise zibe imisebenzi emincane ehlukene engabhekwana nayo ngesikhathi esisodwa. Zitholele uhlelo bese umaka ukuqhubeka kwakho. Umphumela ngamunye obonakalayo uzokunika amandla futhi unikeze umuzwa wokulawula impilo yakho.

Khumbula ukuthi ukungenzi lutho kuwukuziphatha okufundiwe. Kodwa ukuyishintsha kuba nzima uma usujwayele kuze kube yilapho iba yisu lakho lempilo. Lapho uqhubeka ugqolozela kwalasha wokungabi nalusizo kwakho okucatshangelwayo kanye nokungabi nalusizo kwakho, kulapho maningi amathuba okuba lo mgodi uqale ukukubheka (futhi ulawule wena).