Okuqukethwe
Abayibonisi imizwa yabo yangempela, bahlala bekufundisa futhi bakunikeza izeluleko ezingadingekile, futhi ukugxeka kwabo okucasulayo kuhlala kuthatha uhlobo lokukhathazeka. Abantu abanjalo bavame ukubizwa ngokuthi "sinda". Ungazivikela kanjani kuzo?
Ukuxhumana nabo kufana nokuzama ukwanga i-hedgehog - kungakhathaliseki ukuthi uvela kuluphi uhlangothi, usalokhu uhlatshwa. Ngezinye izikhathi kufanele sikhulume nabo nsuku zonke futhi sethemba ukuthi bazoba nomusa kithi. Kodwa abantu "abasindayo" ngezinye izikhathi abakwazi uzwela nozwela. Bazanelisa izidingo zabo ngokucindezela abanye.
Yini okufanele siyenze uma ukuxhumana nabo kungenakugwenywa? Umelaphi womndeni uClaire Dorotic-Nana unikeza amacebiso amahlanu awusizo.
1. Khuluma ngokucacile nangokuzethemba
Abantu be-Cactus bakhetha ukuxhumana okungenakho ukucaca okuphelele. Kungani? Lokhu kubanika ithuba lokuzitholela izaba: “Anishongo ngokuqondile ukuthi kufanele ngifike lapha ngo-10 ekuseni. Bengingazi ukuthi uyayidinga. Awuzange ungitshele."
Abantu “abasindayo” bathanda ukudlulisela umthwalo wemfanelo kwabanye, futhi uma ungakhulumi nabo ngokucacile ngangokunokwenzeka, bazohlala benethuba lokwenza sengathi abaqondi ukuthi yini oyidingayo.
2. Beka imingcele
Imikhawulo nemingcele yomuntu siqu iyingxenye ebalulekile yanoma yibuphi ubudlelwano obunempilo, idlala indima yesisekelo okwakhiwe kuso ukulingana nokuvumelana kobudlelwano. Njengoba abantu "abasindayo" bezama ukugwema ukuqondile nokucaca ekukhulumisaneni, badinga ukucaca ngangokunokwenzeka mayelana nokuthi le mingcele ilele kuphi.
Ngokukwenza kucace ukuthi yini oyilindele kubo, yini abangayilindela kuwe, nalapho udweba khona umugqa phakathi kwalokho okuvunyelwe nokungavunyelwe, ungaqinisekisa ukuthi ukuxhumana akusongeli inhlalakahle.
3. Yazi ukuthi uzohlehla nini
Abantu "abasindayo" bangase bahluke, kodwa bonke bathambekele ekukhohliseni nasekuthandeni ukuziphindiselela. Ngokuvamile sifuna “ukubaphindisela emuva” lapho sibona unya nokungabi naluzwela kwabo. Ngakho sizokwenza izinto zibe zimbi nakakhulu. Abadingi ukuxazulula ukungqubuzana, bafuna ukuziphindiselela. Baqala izingxabano namahlazo ikakhulukazi ukuze bakulimaze. Ukuze uzivikele, udinga ukubona izinhloso zabo zangempela ngokuhamba kwesikhathi futhi ubalekele ekuxhumaneni.
4. Lungiselela izindlela zakho zokubalekela
Abantu "abanzima" bafuna ukukukhohlisa, ukukulawula. Uyindlela kubo yokuthola lokho abangase bakudinge. Mhlawumbe zanelisa isidingo samandla noma isidingo sokutuswa. Kodwa lapho ukuziphatha kwabo kuqala ukusongela inhlalakahle, kuhle ukuba kube nezaba ezizwakalayo ezilungele ukuhamba ngokushesha. Udinga ukuyolanda ingane yakho esikoleni. Unomhlangano obalulekile. Udinga ukuba nesikhathi sokugijima esitolo, uthenge okuthile ngesidlo sakusihlwa. Noma ngabe iyiphi incazelo oyitholayo, yilungiselele kusenesikhathi.
5. Yenza okuthandayo
Ukuxhumana «nameva» kushiya i aftertaste engemnandi. Wenziwa ngamabomu ukuthi uzingabaze futhi uzizwe ungelutho futhi ungakufanelekeli ukuthandwa nokuhlonishwa. Ngokuvamile kuba nomuzwa wokungapheleli, ngenxa yalokho uphinde udonswe ukuhlangana nama-manipulators.
“Abantu abathi bayangikhathalela ngeke bangifisele okubi. Cishe babengafuni ngempela ukungilimaza, uyacabanga. Ungase uqiniseke ukuthi okuthandayo kubi kuwe. Nokho, uma uqhubeka nokuxhumana nalabo abakuphatha kabi ngale ndlela, ubacasula nakakhulu.
Kungcono ukunikela isikhathi kulokho okuthandayo ngempela, kuletha injabulo, injabulo, umuzwa wokuzola nokwaneliseka. Ukuzilibazisa kwakho kukwenza ube yilokho oyikho. Ungavumeli muntu azithathe kuwe.