«Ikhuphoni» — imizwa «iqoqwe endaweni yokugcina» ukuze ikhokhelwe emidlalweni. "Ikhuphoni" yezengqondo ingumqondo wokuhlaziywa kohwebo ngu-Eric Berne.
"Amakhuphoni" angokwengqondo afana kakhulu namakhuphoni esaphulelo anikezwa amakhasimende ezitolo ukuze athenge izimpahla. Kokubili lawo kanye namanye amakhuphoni angaqoqwa, agcinwe, aphonswe noma enze umgunyathi. Kunzima kakhulu kubathandi bokuqoqa "amakhuphoni" angokwengqondo ukuwenqaba, njengoba nje kungaba nzima kubathandi bamakhuphoni okuthenga ukumane bashise izaphulelo. Futhi ekugcineni, kuzo zombili izimo, abanikazi bekhuphoni kufanele bakhokhele amakhuphoni.
Isibonelo "sekhuphoni": inkosikazi, ngemva kokufunda ngokungathembeki komyeni wayo, iyamxosha. Kodwa ngesicelo sakhe esiphikelelayo, ngokushesha uyamvumela ukuba abuyele, kuyilapho ethi: "Hhayi-ke, ungaphila, kodwa khumbula ukuthi owokuqala ngeke abe khona." Ngakho-ke, ngenxa yokukhashelwa, wazithathela "isigqebhezana" esinehlelo elikhulu lokuthukuthela nokudelela ngenkathi yokuqinisekisa engenamkhawulo (ukuphila konke) futhi wathengisa njalo emidlalweni yomndeni.
Ingcaphuno evela encwadini ethi "Transactional Analysis - Eastern Version"
Ababhali: Makarov VV, Makarova GA,
Amaklayenti eza ekwelapheni ngama-albhamu awugqinsi ezitembu, anama-pot-bellied piggy banks. Kwabaningi, ukuqoqa “izitembu” kanye “nezinhlamvu zemali” kuba isisusa esiyinhloko ekuphileni. Ngokuvamile, amaklayenti aqongelela izimpawu zegolide zemizwa eyiqiniso engavumeli ukuba ibonakale "lapha futhi manje", kodwa igcine, enye "ngosuku lwemvula", enye yeholide.
Nasi isibonelo esivamile. USveta, udokotela, oneminyaka engama-43. "I-albhamu" yakhe yayibizwa ngokuthi "Loving Woman". Imizwa eyiqiniso yenjabulo, okulindelwe uthando, ububele, ubulili kwakufihlwe ngemuva kwemizwa yokunganaki yokunganaki amadoda. Emndenini, umama wenqabela "ukuba ngowesifazane": ukusebenzisa izimonyo, ukugqoka ngokugqamile. “Ungazalwa umuhle, kodwa uzalwe ujabule”, “akusibo ubuhle, kodwa umusa owenza umuntu abe muhle”, “Bahlangatshezwa izingubo, baphelezelwa ingqondo”. Intombazane yanquma ukuhlakanipha, inomusa futhi ilinde inkosana impilo yayo yonke. "Ku-albhamu" yakhe unamathisele izitembu zemizwa yakhe eyiqiniso yenjabulo nothando engavezwanga. Umklomelo wakhe kwakuwukuba iNkosana kuphela. Futhi "i-albhamu" kwakuyilobo lakhe.
Lapho esebenza ngezitembu, umelaphi ubuza iklayenti imibuzo eminingi. Ithini i-piggy bank yakho? Yimuphi umumo, usayizi, umbala? Ingabe ikati noma ingulube? Ingabe iyasinda noma ayinalutho? Kuyoze kube nini uzoqhubeka nokuqoqa izinhlamvu zemali zemizwa engashiwongo? Ingabe imizwa yakho iyaqina noma iyiqiniso? Yiziphi izitembu oziqoqayo? Mangaki ama-albhamu onawo? Nikeza izihloko kuma-albhamu akho. Uziqoqa isikhathi esingakanani? Imuphi umklomelo ongathanda ukuwuthola? Kulesi sigaba, kubalulekile ukuhlukanisa, ukuhlukanisa iklayenti emizweni yakhe ye-racket, isibonelo, ukusebenzisa izithombe ezibukwayo zama-albhamu, ama-piggy banks. Okulandelayo, umelaphi neklayenti bahlaziya amaqoqo kanye nembuyiselo elindelekile ngokuningiliziwe. Phakathi nomsebenzi, iklayenti liyaqaphela ukuthi, ngemva kokuhlukana neqoqo, lahlukana ngokuphindisela. Lapha kubalulekile ukwenza inqubo yokuhlukanisa, ukumema iklayenti ukwenza umkhuba. Sisebenzisa amasu e-trance. Nansi enye yezinketho zombhalo: “Ungethula ama-albhamu akho nezitembu kuwo. Ama-piggy banks. Khetha indlela yokuwasusa. Kungaba umlilo omkhulu oyisiko. Mhlawumbe kubukeka njengomlilo wamavulandlela. Kufanelekile uma ubulokhu ulondoloza izitembu kusukela ngalezo zikhathi. Noma mhlawumbe umlilo omkhulu we-shaman, lapho ithunzi ligijima khona, abalingiswa bempilo yakho, likumaskandi we-carnival nemvunulo. Babheke ngokucophelela. Ubani ongemuva kwezifihla-buso, benzani, bakhuluma ngani. Iyini imizwa nemizwelo yabo? Ingabe bajabule noma badabukile? Bheka, lalela, uzwe ukuthi kwenzekani nxazonke. Futhi uma usulungile, thatha ama-albhamu akho uwaphakamise, manje uphonsa ama-albhamu emlilweni. Buka amakhasi eqhubeka. Izitembu zihlakazeka kanjani, zivutha umlilo futhi zithele ngomlotha. Ubani oseceleni kwakho? Bheka nxazonke, yini eshintshile. Obani laba abami eduze kwakho? Ingabe bagqoke izifihla-buso noma cha? Babheke. Benzani, bakhuluma ngani, banamuphi umoya.
Ingabe unalo ibhange lezingulube? Uma ikhona, zicabange uyishaya ngesando esikhulu futhi uyiphihliza kubahlinzeki. Noma minza olwandle oluluhlaza okwesibhakabhaka, ubophe i-cobblestone ehloniphekile "ku-kitty" noma "ingulube" oyikhonzile.
Yeka ubunzima bemizwa enqwabelene. Bavalelise. Memeza kakhulu "Usale kahle!".
Racket imizwa
Ngokwesibonelo, indoda ibekezelela umkayo ophishekela umsebenzi othile ngentshiseko. Umuzwa wakhe wangempela wokwesaba isizungu, ukulahlwa, uthathelwa indawo ukucasuka kwe-racket. Akayibonisi obala imizwa yakhe eyiqiniso. Akamtsheli iqiniso umkakhe:
“S’thandwa, ngesaba kakhulu ukulahlekelwa nguwe. Wena ungukukhanya efasiteleni kimi, incazelo yempilo yami, injabulo nokuthula. Kungenzeka ukuthi owesifazane ngemva kwamagama anjalo ngeke ahlale engenandaba futhi uzokwenza konke ukuze asondelene kakhulu nale ndoda. Kodwa-ke, empeleni, umyeni ubonisa ukungabi nandaba kwe-racket futhi aqongelela izimpawu zokucasuka ngokuphindisela. Lapho "indebe yokubekezela" iphuphuma, uveza konke mayelana nezikhalo zakhe. Unkosikazi uyahamba. Uhlala yedwa. Inkokhelo yakhe yisizungu ayesaba kakhulu. Bona →