"Isikhathi sakho sesiphelile": kungani iseshini ne-psychotherapist imfushane kangaka

Kubantu abanquma ukufuna usizo lokwelapha okokuqala ngqa, izindaba zokuthi iseshini eyodwa ihlala isikhathi esingakanani ngokuvamile ziyadumaza. Futhi ngempela - yini engenziwa ngaphansi kwehora? Kwenzeka kanjani ukuthi “ihora lokwelapha” libe lifushane kangaka?

“Kunemibono eminingana, futhi eminye ize isibhekise kuFreud,” kuchaza isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo nochwepheshe bomndeni uBecky Styumfig. "Akukho ukuvumelana kulokhu, kodwa iqiniso limile ukuthi imizuzu engama-45-50 yisikhathi esijwayelekile umelaphi asichitha neklayenti." Kunezizathu eziningi zalokhu, kokubili okusebenzayo kanye nezengqondo.

Logistics

Lokhu kulula kakhulu ngokwemibandela ye-logistics, nakuwo wonke umuntu: kokubili kuklayenti, elingakwazi ukwenza i-aphoyintimenti nochwepheshe ngaphambi komsebenzi futhi ngokushesha ngemva (futhi abanye ngisho nangesikhathi sesidlo sasemini), kanye nomelaphi odinga i-10- 15 -imizuzu yekhefu phakathi kwamaseshini ukuze ubhale amanothi esimisweni esisanda kuphela, shayela labo ababefonile phakathi neseshini, phendula imiyalezo, futhi ekugcineni, vele uphuze amanzi futhi uphumule.

"Iseshini ingaba nzima kakhulu ngokwengqondo kuchwepheshe ngokwakhe, futhi ikhefu liwukuphela kwethuba lokukhipha umoya nokululama," kuchaza isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo uTammer Malati. "Leli ukuphela kwethuba lokuqalisa kabusha, "ukusuka" kuklayenti langaphambilini futhi ucule ngokwengqondo ukuhlangabezana nelandelayo," u-Styumfig uvuma.

Abanye abelaphi baze bafinyeze amaseshini abe yimizuzu engama-45 noma bahlele amakhefu esigamu sehora phakathi kweziguli.

Okuqukethwe yimihlangano

Lapho iseshini iba mfishane, ingxoxo iba nenjongo futhi “ibalulekile”. Ngokubona ukuthi unehora elingaphansi kwehora, iklayenti, njengomthetho, alihambi ezincazelweni ezinde. Ngaphezu kwalokho, ngale ndlela akudingeki abuyele ekuhlangenwe nakho okubuhlungu okudlule isikhathi eside. Ngaphandle kwalokho, amaklayenti azophinde ahlukumezeke futhi angakwazi ukuza emhlanganweni olandelayo.

“Ihora noma ngaphezulu uwedwa ngemizwa yakho, ikakhulukazi engemihle, lingaphezu kwamandla kwabaningi. Ngemva kwalokho, kunzima ukuba babuyele emisebenzini yansuku zonke, futhi ngisho nangokwengeziwe ukusebenza, "kuchaza isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo uBrittany Bufar.

Lesi sikhathi sinomthelela ekwakhiweni kwemingcele phakathi komelaphi kanye neklayenti. U-Stumfig uphawula ukuthi iseshini yemizuzu engama-45 noma engu-50 izovumela umelaphi ukuthi ahlale eqondile, engahluleli, ngaphandle kokujula kakhulu ezinkingeni zeklayenti futhi angazifaki enhliziyweni.

Ukusebenzisa isikhathi ngendlela efanele

Phakathi nemihlangano emifushane, izinhlangothi zombili zizama ukusebenzisa isikhathi esitholakala kuzo kakhulu. “Le yindlela iklayenti kanye nomelaphi abafinyelela ngayo enhliziyweni yenkinga ngokushesha. Noma iyiphi inkulumo encane ingaba ukusebenzisa isikhathi ngokungahlakaniphile, okuyinto edume kabi,” kuchaza uStümfig.

Uma iklayenti iqonda ukuthi inkinga yakhe isemhlabeni wonke futhi akunakwenzeka ukuthi ixazululwe ngeseshini, lokhu kuyamshukumisela, kanye nomelaphi, ukuthi abheke izixazululo ezingokoqobo zendawo, amasu "angasuswa" futhi asetshenziswe kuze kube yisikhathi esilandelayo. .

ULaurie Gottlieb, isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo nomlobi wencwadi ethi Maybe You Should Talk to Someone, uthi: “Lapho siba nesikhathi esiningi, ngokuvamile kuthatha isikhathi eside ukuthi sifinyelele umnyombo wenkinga. Ngaphezu kwalokho, ekupheleni kweseshini ende, iklayenti kanye nomelaphi bangase babhekane nokukhathala noma ngisho nokutubeka. Ngokuvamile, ifomethi yesigamu sehora ifanele izingane: ukugxila ngisho nemizuzu engu-45-50 kunzima kakhulu kwabaningi babo.

Ukwenziwa kolwazi

Umelaphi womndeni uSaniya Mayo uqhathanisa izikhathi zokwelapha nezifundo zasesikoleni esiphakeme. Phakathi nesifundo, umfundi uthola inani elithile lolwazi ngesifundo esithile. Lokhu kwaziswa kusadingeka “kugaywe” futhi kubambe ngekhanda amaphuzu ayinhloko ukuze ukwazi ukwenza umsebenzi wesikole.

"Ungakwazi ukwelula iseshini amahora amane - umbuzo kuphela ukuthi iklayenti lizothatha ini futhi likukhumbule kulokhu," kuchaza uMayo. “Kunzima “ukugaya” ukwaziswa okuningi, okusho ukuthi kunzima ukuthola inzuzo engokoqobo kuyo.” Ngakho-ke lapho amaklayenti ethi iseshini eyodwa ngeviki ayanele kubo, umelaphi ngokuvamile uphakamisa ukuthi kwandiswe imvamisa yezikhathi, hhayi ubude beseshini ngayinye.

“Kimina kubonakala sengathi umphumela wamaseshini amabili amafushane uzoba mkhulu kunowodwa omude. Kufana nezidlo ezimbili ezincane ngezikhathi ezihlukene esikhundleni sokudla okukodwa nje okunenhliziyo enhle,” kuphawula uGottlieb. - Isidlo sasemini esiningi kakhulu ngeke sigaywe ngokujwayelekile: umzimba udinga isikhathi, ikhefu phakathi "kokudla".

Ukusetshenziswa kolwazi olutholiwe

Ekwelapheni, kubalulekile hhayi kuphela lokho esikufundile esifundweni, nokuthi yimiphi imininingwane esiyishiyile, kodwa futhi nalokho esikwenzile phakathi kwemihlangano nomelaphi, ukuthi silusebenzise kanjani ulwazi namakhono esiwatholile.

"Kubalulekile, hhayi ubude bezikhathi," u-Styumfig uqinisekile. - Iklayenti akufanele isebenze kuphela emihlanganweni nomelaphi, kodwa futhi phakathi kwabo: bonisa, ulandelele ukuziphatha kwakhe, zama ukusebenzisa amakhono amasha angokwengqondo uchwepheshe amfundise wona. Kuthatha isikhathi ukuthi ulwazi olutholiwe lufaniswe futhi kuqale izinguquko ezinhle.”

INGABE INGABA ISESHINI?

Nakuba iseshini yemizuzu engama-45-50 ithathwa njengejwayelekile, udokotela wengqondo ngamunye ukhululekile ukunquma ubude besikhathi semihlangano. Ngaphezu kwalokho, ukusebenza nabashadile kanye nemindeni ngokuvamile kuthatha okungenani ihora nesigamu. “Wonke umuntu kufanele abe nesikhathi sokukhuluma futhi azindle ngalokho akuzwayo,” kuchaza umelaphi womkhaya uNicole Ward. Umhlangano womuntu ngamunye ungase uthathe isikhathi eside, ikakhulukazi uma iklayenti lisesimweni esibucayi.

Abanye abelaphi baphinde banikeze isikhathi esengeziwe somhlangano wokuqala ukuze baqoqe ulwazi oluningi ngangokunokwenzeka, bahlonze inkinga ngendlela efanele, futhi basize isiguli senze isicelo.

Kunoma yikuphi, uma unomuzwa wokuthi, naphezu kwezingxabano ezingenhla, udinga isikhathi esengeziwe, ungangabazi ukukhuluma nochwepheshe ngakho. Ndawonye ngokuqinisekile nizothola inketho evumelana kokubili.