Okuqukethwe
UMonique de Kermadec uyingxenye: “ kuyindlela yokuvikela ingane ngokweqile. Uyazi ukuthi ubhekiwe. Ingane izophila ngaphansi kokwesaba ukujeziswa, ngeke esakwazi ukuzilawula lapho ebhekene nengozi. Ukuqapha kwakhe kuzokwehla futhi angazifaka engozini ngempela ”. Ngasohlangothini lomzali, sisesifisweni sokuba khona yonke indawo “angikho, kodwa ngiyafana lapho”. Ngokuphambene nalokho, isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo, isikhala senkululeko phakathi komzali nengane siyadingeka: "Ingane idinga ukuphila impilo yayo, ihlukaniswe nomzali. Kulapho umzali engekho lapho ingane ikhula futhi iba namava ayo ”.
“Izingane kufanele zenze ubuwula”
KuMichaël Stora, “lokhu kungase kukhuthaze ukuziphatha okuyingozi ukuze kweqe lokhu kuvikeleka okweqile. Ingane izofuna ukweqa futhi mhlawumbe okuyingozi kakhulu ”. Isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo sichaza ukuthi “siku-hyperparentity: abazali bafuna ukulawula ingane yabo, futhi ngokubuyisela, ukuthandwa. Lezi zinto ezixhunyiwe zikhuthaza amaphupho abazali okulawula impilo yengane yabo ”. Kulo chwepheshe, "Kudingeka ukuthi noma yimuphi umuntu enze" izinto eziwubuwula ", ukuze afune ukweqa imingcele. Ukubuka ingane yakho akushiyi isikhala sokuhlangenwe nakho kwakho siqu. Uma ifuna ukuhambisa ingane efunda nayo ekhaya bese iphuma endleleni, umzali uzokwazi kungakapheli umzuzu. Kuzofanele aziphendulele ngalokho akwenzayo ngesikhathi sangempela. Asisekho indawo yezinto ezingalindelekile ”. Embuzweni wezingozi ezingaba khona njengokuthumba okungasongela ingane, uchwepheshe uphendula ngokuthi “izikhathi eziningi izingane zithunjwa yisihlobo esijwayelene nemikhuba yengane”. U-Elodie, omunye umama naye ucabanga ukuthi lolu hlobo lwento lungaba usizo “esimeni sokucindezeleka” kodwa “kufanele siqaphele ukuhlukunyezwa okungenzeka”.
Ngempela, ukuqondisa ingane yakho akuyona into encane.
Izingane zidinga ubumfihlo
UMattieu, oneminyaka engu-13, unombono wakhe ngalo mbuzo: “Akuwona umqondo omuhle. Ubudlelwano bami nomama bebungeke bube buhle ngempela. Ngeke ngifune ukugadwa yikho konke engikwenzayo. “Ngakolunye uhlangothi, kuLenny, oneminyaka eyi-10:” Akukubi le GPS yejazi, kanjalo, umama uyazi ukuthi ngikuphi. Kodwa ukube bengimkhulu, bengingeke ngikuthande, bengingacabanga ukuthi ubunhloli ”. UVirginie, umama wabafana ababili abaneminyaka engu-8 nengu-3 ubudala, uchaza ukuthi akakakulungeli ukutshala imali kulezi mishini: “Kumelwe uzibeke ezicathulweni zezingane zethu, ungathanda yini ukuthi abazali bakho bazi kahle ukuthi wenzani? ukwenza futhi kuphi? “.
UMonique de Kermadec uyacacisa ” kunoma yikuphi, abazali kufanele bakhunjuzwe ukuthi ingane idinga ubumfihlo ngisho noma incane. Izinto ezixhunyiwe zibonwa ngokucacile njengezinhloli. Kubalulekile ukuthi umzali naye akhulume ukuze achaze ukuthi kungani eyibuka ingane ”. Uchwepheshe uphinde avuse inkinga yokuvikelwa kwempilo yangasese: "uma ungakwazi ukuxhuma ukude kulolu hlobo lwethuluzi, kusho ukuthi abanye abantu bangakwenza". Umbono owanikezwa uMarie, omunye umama: “Izingane zami zinonyaka o-3 no-1 ubudala. Ngimele futhi ngiphikisa. Njengoba konke okwenzekayo kulezi zinsuku, ukukwazi ukuthola ingane yakho noma nini kuyalinga. Kodwa ngimelene nakho ngoba ngokuhlakanipha kwekhompyutha akunakwenzeka ukuthi abanye (futhi hhayi abanezinhloso ezinhle) nabo bangakwenza. Futhi ukuqapha kwabazali akufanele kwenziwe ngekhompyutha ”.
Abazali kufanele banikeze izingane zabo amandla
OkaMichael Stora, lezi zinto ezixhumene ziphendula "ezinkathazo zabazali". Lo mkhuba “ukhombisa ubunzima abanye abazali abanabo bokungakwazi ukwabelana ngayo yonke into nengane yabo”. Isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo siphinde sigcizelele “ekubalulekeni kokuba ingane ibe khona ngaphandle kombono womzali. Kulokhu kuntuleka lapho kuzalwa khona umcabango womuntu. Futhi iizinto ezixhunyiwe zakha isixhumanisi esihlala njalo, umzali uhlala ekhona “. Ngamanye amazwi, ingane ngeke isaba nendawo yokuphila kwayo yangasese edingekayo ukuze kwakhiwe ubuntu bayo. Isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo sikholelwa ukuthi “abazali kufanele bangabaze indlela yabo yothando, yokwamukela ngempela ukuzimela kwengane yabo ngaphandle kokufuna ukuyiqapha ukude”. Ekugcineni, abazali “bangabafundisi, okufanele baphelekezele ingane futhi bayivumele ibaleke eyakhe”.