Lapho sikhula, yilapho sihlakanipha ngokwengeziwe: isisho asibonisi iqiniso. Ukuthuthuka kweminyaka yezinto eziphilayo akuqinisekisi ukuvuthwa ngaso sonke isikhathi. Abanye abantu abadala bazohlala bengavuthiwe impilo yonke lapho izingane zihlakulela isimilo esivuthiwe kusenesikhathi. Ochwepheshe embuzweni bahlukanisa izinhlobo ezimbili zokungavuthwa: ukungavuthwa kwengqondo kanye nokungakhuli okuthinta ingqondo, okubuye kubizwe ngokuthi "i-infantilism" kuze kube sekuqaleni kwekhulu lesi-XNUMX. Ukuba yingane impilo yakho yonke kubizwa nangokuthi i-Peter Pan syndrome.

Ukubona ukungavuthwa, kuyadingeka ukuthi ube nento yokuqhathanisa nokuziphatha komuntu oshiwo ngokuhlukile "ovuthiwe". Kodwa ukuvuthwa kuhumusha kanjani? Kunzima ukukulinganisa, kungukwazisa okuvamisile ukungaveli ekubukeni okunenhloso.

U-Peter Blos, isazi se-psychoanalyst, ugxile ocwaningweni lwakhe mayelana nesiqephu kusukela ebusheni kuya ekubeni umuntu omdala kanye nombuzo wokuthola lesi simo sokuvuthwa. Ngokuthola kwakhe, uchaze ukuvuthwa ngokuthi:

• ikhono lokuzilawula;
• ukulawula imizwelo nemizwelo engokwemvelo;
• ikhono lokucabanga nokuxazulula izingxabano zangaphakathi ngokukhathazeka okulingene nokuzinqoba;
• amandla okusungula ubudlelwano nabanye eqenjini ngenkathi ugcina amandla abucayi.

Ngakho-ke ukuvuthwa kuhambisana namandla akhonjwe eminyakeni yobudala bomuntu. Enganeni encane eneminyaka engu-5 ubudala, ukuvuthwa kusho ukushiya ingubo yakho ekhaya ukuze uye esikoleni, isibonelo. Ngomfana oneminyaka engu-11 ubudala, uzokwazi ukungakwazi ukuthatheka ekulweni esikoleni. Kanti osemusha kubhekwa ukuthi angakwazi ukwenza umsebenzi wakhe wesikole ngaphandle kokuthi kungenelele omunye wabazali bakhe ukumkhomba ukuthi sekuyisikhathi.

Ungaba ongavuthiwe impilo yakho yonke. Ukungavuthwa komuntu omdala kungase kulinganiselwe ezindaweni ezithile: abanye bangase babe nokuziphatha okuvamile kochwepheshe kodwa ukuziphatha ngokomzwelo komntwana.

Eqinisweni, amanye amadoda abheka abafazi bawo njengomama wesibili, abanye abazange badlule ku-edipal complex: bawela ekuhlanganiseni ngokomzwelo nangokobulili.

Ukungavuthwa okusebenzayo kuchazwa u-Peter Blos njengokuthi: “ukubambezeleka ekuthuthukisweni kobudlelwane obuthinta inhliziyo, okuthambekele ekwethembekeni nokusikisela okuvusa ukuthinteka kwezingane, okuqhathaniswa kubantu abadala nezinga lokuthuthuka kwemisebenzi yobuhlakani. . "

Ukungavuthwa kwengqondo noma ukwahlulela ngukungabi bucayi okungathi sína komqondo obucayi nokuqwashisa ngokuziphatha kwamagugu ayisisekelo adingwa yinoma ikuphi ukukhetha. Eqinisweni, umuntu akakwazi ukwenza ukukhetha okukhululekile nokunomthwalo wemfanelo.

Ukungavuthwa okusebenzayo kanye nokungavuthwa kwengqondo kuxhumene kakhulu ngoba i-affective sphere isebenzisana njalo ne-inlectual sphere.

Abantu abanezinkinga zokuvuthwa bayakugwema ukubandakanyeka. Bahlehlisa iminqamulajuqu abazikhethele yona. Kodwa-ke, bangavuka beneminyaka engama-35 noma engama-40 ukuze baphume ebuntwaneni: babe nengane, bashade ukuze bazinze futhi bayeke ukuzulazula kwezocansi.

Izimpawu ezihlukile

Ukungakhuli akuyona i-pathology kodwa izimpawu ezimbalwa noma ukuziphatha kungaxwayisa labo abaseduze kwakho:

• ukulungiswa okuyihaba ezithombeni zabazali;
• isidingo sokuvikelwa: ububele buwuphawu lwesidingo sokuvikelwa;
• ukuncika ngokomzwelo;
• umkhawulo wokuzicabangela wena;
• kunalokho okukhethekile egoism enenkani, narcissism;
• ukwehluleka ukunqoba izingxabano;
• ukungabekezeleli ukukhungatheka;
• Ukungakhuli ngokocansi, ukungabi namandla, ukuhwalala akuvamile: abakangeni ekuhwebeni okuguquguqukayo. Singakwazi futhi ukuqaphela ukuchezuka okuthile kwezocansi noma ukuhlanekezelwa (i-pedophilia, njll.);
• benze okwezingane: bafuna ukuthola konke abakufunayo ngokushesha njengabantwana;
• ukuxhamazela: akukho ukulawula imizwelo kanye nemicabango esheshayo ephuma ngobudlova;
• ukwenqaba ukuzibophezela: ukuphila okwamanje, ngokushesha, irejista yezinto ezintsha ezihlala njalo.

Kumuntu ongavuthiwe ngokomzwelo, umuntu angabona ukuthi abalingisi be-TV nezinkanyezi zebhizinisi ezibonisa kubaluleke kakhulu kunabantu bansuku zonke. Indawo yonke yokufakelwa kwesikrini esincane noma ikhompyutha ithatha indawo yeqiniso.

Ukusetshenziswa okujulile nokungakhethi kwemidlalo yamakhompiyutha, i-inthanethi namakhompiyutha kuvumela laba bantu ukuthi bazihlukanise nokwangempela ukuze bangene kokubonakalayo, okuba umkhathi wabo omusha, ngaphandle kwemingcele nesibopho sokwamukela amakhodi okuvuthwa afunwa ngokoqobo.

Ukungavuthwa kwengqondo noma ukungavuthwa kokwahlulela kuholela ekuntuleni umqondo obucayi noma unembeza wokuziphatha ukuze ukwazi ukukhetha ukuphila. Umuntu akakwazi ukuzikhethela yena noma abanye.

Ukungakhuli ngokomqondo kubhekwa njengokukhubazeka kwengqondo okungaba okujulile, okumaphakathi noma okuthambile.

Yenza ukuxilongwa

Ukwenza ukuxilongwa nokuchaza ukungavuthwa kwesiguli ngakho-ke kungumsebenzi onzima ngenxa yobuningi bezimbangela nezimpawu.

Kubalulekile ukuthi odokotela bomndeni bacele uchwepheshe bengqondo obujulile. Ngakho-ke udokotela wezifo zengqondo uzokwazi ukucacisa ukuthi:

• ukuntula inqubekela phambili kwesiguli kuwumsuka obuhlungu futhi wehliswa ijubane noma washintshwa isenzakalo sangaphandle ngesikhathi sobuntwana noma ubusha;
• noma uma lokhu kungavuthwa kubangelwa ukuntula amandla obuhlakani, okungenzeka kungenxa yesifo, noma ukukhubazeka kofuzo.

Kuzo zombili lezi zimo, lapho ukukhubazeka kwengqondo kutholakala, umuntu akakwazi ukusebenzisa ukwahlulela okuhle okuzombophezela ekuphileni konke. Ngakho-ke kufanele inakekelwe ngokushesha kungaba ngesakhiwo esizinikezele noma umndeni.