Ukubalwa kwabantu kokugcina kwe-INSEE okwenziwa ngo-2013 kubonisa ukuthi manje, ingane eyodwa kweziyishumi ihlala emndenini oxubile. Uma lesi simo sasingavamile emashumini ambalwa eminyaka adlule, sekuyinsakavukela umchilo wesidwaba eminyakeni yamuva nje. Gxila ebudlelwaneni phakathi kwezelamani ngamzali munye.

Ukufika emndenini we-half-brother noma udadewabo kuyisenzakalo esibaluleke kakhulu empilweni yengane. Lena enye ingane ayigcini nje ngokuqinisa isibopho somkhaya phakathi komzali nosingamzali kodwa futhi iqinisekisa ukuhlukana kokugcina kwabazali ababili abazalayo.

Ngaleyondlela umntwana udabukile phakathi kokudumala (“abazali bami abasoze babuyelana”) kanye nenjabulo (“Ekugcineni ngizohlala emkhayeni omusha oqinile”). Ngaphezu kwalokho, injabulo yokuba umfowethu / udadewethu omkhulu ibuye ibe nomuzwa womona nokushiywa ngaphandle: “umfowethu ngomzali oyedwa / udadewethu ozalwa ngomzali oyedwa uzoba nethuba lokuhlala nabazali bakhe bobabili kuyilapho mina ngingekho. . 'ngizoba nakho baba/umama wami'.

Uma umzali ethatha isinqumo sokuba nengane nosingamzali, lo wakamuva ube eseshintsha isimo, akaseyena umlingani kayise noma unina kuphela kodwa uba nguyise noma unina womfowabo ongumzali oyedwa/udadewabo ongumzali oyedwa. Isibopho esijulile siyakhiwa futhi ngokuvamile siqinisa umndeni.

Uma ngabe wayesenabafowabo, ingane yayinendawo eqinile phakathi kwabafowabo. Ukufika kukamfowabo ngamzali munye noma udadewabo ngomzali oyedwa kungaphazamisa isimo sakhe, isibonelo ngokumenza asuke emncane noma omncane aye kumfowabo omkhulu/udadewabo omkhulu. Ngaphezu kwalokho, ingane ingase izithole ingakhululekile phakathi komkhaya omusha onobunye lapho izizwa ikhishwe khona kancane kancane. Ngakho-ke kudingekile ukumqinisekisa, ukumkhuthaza futhi kumenze azizwe enecala.

Ngenxa yalokhu, umzali kufanele amkhumbuze ukuthi ubuhlobo babo buyohlala buqinile futhi futhi babuyisithelo sothando phakathi kwabazali ababili. Ukuqeda ukwesaba kwakhe ngokumqinisekisa ngothando umzali ngamunye analo ngaye kubalulekile lapho ingane iyeza. Kubalulekile futhi ukuthi uhlale unake kakhulu izidingo zakho ngalesi sikhathi.

Umzali ongamzali angakhuthaza ingane ukuthi inakekele ingane futhi ibaluleke ngokuyimema ukuba isebenzise ngokugcwele indawo yakhe ka-big-brother / big-sister.

Okokugcina, uma omunye umzali eseyedwa noma enenkinga ngobuhlobo obusha, kufanele bagweme ukuthulula isifuba enganeni ngangokunokwenzeka. Ngempela, ingane ezwa ukuthi omunye umzali udabukile izokuthola kunzima ukuzizwa ikhululekile phakathi komndeni wayo omusha. Ngenxa yokwethembeka, uzozizwa enecala futhi kuthathe isikhathi eside ukuthola indawo yakhe azi ukuthi omunye umzali wakhe uhlushwa yile nyunyana entsha.

Sikhuluma ngezingane zakithi “quasi” lapho umndeni ohlanganisiwe uhlanganisa izingane eziningana ezivela ezinyunyaneni ezahlukahlukene, ngokwesibonelo, lapho izingane zikababa wokuza zizohlala endlini. Lobu budlelwano bubonakala kulula ukuphatha ezinganeni ezincane kunasentsheni. Kulolu hlobo lwamacala, ukwabiwa kwabazali, umbono wendawo nendawo yezelamani kungaba yinkinga. Nokho, masiphawule ukuthi phakathi kwabo, izingane zivame ukukhuluma kakhulu ngezingane zakubo kunokuba zikhulume “abafowabo nodadewabo”; kwakhiwa ubuhlobo obuqinile nobujulile, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi yiziphi izikhalo zabo.

Ukuze wonke umuntu azizwe ejabule futhi athole indawo yakhe, kuhle ukuhlela imihlangano eminingana phakathi kwezingane ngaphambi kokuthuthela ndawonye. Ukuhlanganyela isikhathi sokuphumula nokuhlangana kaningi izinyanga ezimbalwa ngokungangabazeki kuyisinyathelo esidingekayo ukuze ungacasuli izingane ekuphileni kwazo kwansuku zonke.

Uma abazali bobabili bethatha isinqumo sokuhlala ndawonye futhi izingane kufanele zihlanganyele ndawonye indlu (kwesinye isikhathi ngisho negumbi), ngakho-ke kungcono ukubavumela bathathe amamaki abo. Imidwebo, izithombe zawo wonke amalungu omndeni ohlanganisiwe, umhlobiso wamahhala ongaphezulu noma omncane emakamelweni okulala, njll. Kubalulekile ukubavumela ukuba bathathe indawo.

Izinjabulo ezivamile (imisebenzi yangaphandle, uhambo, njll.) Kuzoba ngamathuba amaningi okuqinisa ubudlelwano phakathi kwezingane. Kungokufanayo nangemikhuba emincane ezoqinisa imizwa yabo yokuba ngabesizwe esifanayo (ukuya e-zoo njalo ngenyanga, ebusuku nge-pancake ngeSonto, njll.).

Ukufika kwelungu elisha emndenini akuyona into encane enganeni, ukuyilungiselela, ukuyiqinisekisa nokumazisa konke kuyizenzo ezizoyisiza ukuba iphile lesi sigaba esibalulekile empilweni yayo ngangokunokwenzeka.