Abesifazane abaningi bakulungele ukwenza noma yini ukuze izingane zabo zijabule. Abanye basebenzisa ingane ukuze bazidonsele amehlo, futhi benze izivivinyo eziyinqaba endodeni encane.
I-2017 ingabizwa ngokuphepha ngokuthi unyaka lapho abazali abaningi, njengoba besho, bahlanya. Nsuku zonke, kuba nemiyalezo emisha: omunye umama ufuna indawo yokudweba imifanekiso yezithombe zendodana eneminyaka emihlanu ubudala, omunye ubheka indodakazi yakhe njengempahla yakhe futhi ulayisha isithombe somntwana ononyaka owodwa obhoboziwe. Usuku Lwabesifazane luqoqe ngesilinganiso esisodwa bonke omama abaxakile abakholelwa ukuthi bangenza noma yini abayifunayo ngezingane zabo.
Ngo-Ephreli walo nyaka, umphakathi uchukunyiswe yisikhundla esingajwayelekile somunye umama. Wacela iseluleko ngesipho sendodana yakhe. Ngokunembayo, lona wesifazane usevele enqume ngokumangala uqobo - "i-tattoo enhle endikimbeni yobudlelwano phakathi kukamama nendodana." Ucele kuphela ukuncoma isaluni kuye, lapho bezokwazi ukuhumusha umbono wakhe ube ngokoqobo. Abasebenzisi be-Reddit, lapho okuthunyelwe kuthunyelwe khona, bamangala: ngemva kwakho konke, kusukela eminyakeni engu-16, osemusha angakwazi ukuza e-salon nabazali bakhe kalula, futhi ngeke anqabe. Kwakucatshangwa ukuthi umfana wokuzalwa uneminyaka engu-13-14 ubudala. Kulokhu, kungcono ngempela ukulinda nge-tattoo. Nokho, impendulo yashaqisa wonke umuntu: umfana wayeneminyaka emihlanu kuphela ngaleso sikhathi, futhi tattoo kwakufanele kube isipho ngosuku lwakhe lokuzalwa lwesithupha. Abasebenzisi bazama ukubonisana nomama: kule minyaka, umzimba usathuthuka, futhi akwaziwa ukuthi ingane izosabela kanjani ebuhlungu. Izingane eziningi kanye nomjovo ovela kudokotela azikwazi ukubekezela ngaphandle kwezinyembezi. Abanye baye basikisela ukuyekethisa: "umhumushi", osetshenziswa ngokushesha futhi ngeke alimaze ingane. Ukuthi umama wasilalela yini iseluleko esinengqondo akwaziwa.
Kodwa umama ongayedwa u-Amy Lin usenesikhathi eside esebenzisa ama-tattoo endodakazi yakhe. Udaya izinwele zakhe ngemibala emihle futhi amvumele ukuthi enze izimonyo. Ezingosini zakhe zokuxhumana, umama ngokuzithandela udalula izithombe zentombazane, lapho abagxeki abaningi behlangana khona njalo. Futhi abantu abaningi bacabanga ukuthi ukusebenzisa ingane njengonodoli akwamukeleki. Kungabonakala ukuthi intombazane imane ikopisha umama wayo ongakahleleki: U-Amy Lin ngokwakhe ugqoka izinwele ezipinki nama-tattoos emzimbeni wakhe wonke. Kodwa le ntombazane ayiboni lokhu njengenkinga ethile: “Ngimane nje ngivumele uBella abe yimina. Akakwesabi ukugxekwa, unesibindi. Ngifuna ukumnika inkululeko yokukhuluma. Khona-ke ngeke kudingeke ukuba achithe isikhathi sobusha bakhe ukuze aqonde ukuthi uyini ngempela. Uma efunda ukuveza imizwa yakhe ngokubukeka kwakhe, uzofunda ukukhuluma ngalokho okubalulekile kuye. Inkululeko yokukhuluma, uyaqonda? Ngeke angabaze ukukhuluma ngemizwa nezifiso zakhe. ” Akubona bonke abahlanganyela le ndlela entsha yokukhulisa izingane, kodwa kukhona abasekela u-Ann.
Inkinga "ukuba ube noma ungabi?" emhlabeni wobuhle isikhule yaba “ukupenda noma ukungapendi?” Lo mbuzo unzima ikakhulukazi uma kuziwa ezinganeni ezincane. Ama-blogger wobuhle bemfashini ku-Instagram naku-YouTube akhipha amavidiyo anemininingwane yokuthi angakwenza kanjani lokhu noma lokho kuzimonyo. Nazi nje izingane ezisezithendeni zazo, eziphatha ngezimpushana nezindebe zomlomo ezingezimbi kakhulu kunabaculi abangochwepheshe be-make-up. Ngokwesibonelo, Charlie Rose. Lo mncane uneminyaka emihlanu kuphela ubudala, kodwa kakade usebenzisa ama-highlighters, isisekelo kanye ne-glitter. Akubona bonke abantu abadala abasebenzisa izindlela ezinjalo. Ngokungamangalisi, abanye babonisa ukunganeliseki ngokuphelele. Okokuqala, abazali bentombazane, abavumela uCharlie Rose ukuba enze lokhu. Kodwa-ke, bazama ukuqinisekisa izethameli: intombazane yenza izimonyo nevidiyo kuphela njengento yokuzilibazisa, ngezikhathi ezijwayelekile ibukeka njengengane evamile.
Okufanele ukuthathe komama abasebasha ngokwabo abasanda kuzalwa futhi bengakabi naso isikhathi sokukhula. Kodwa lapho inkosikazi eyisibonelo nomama wezingane eziyisithupha eqala ukugcona ingane, umphakathi uyadlondlobala. Ngakho kwenzeka ngo-Enedina Vance, owathumela isithombe sendodakazi yakhe enonyaka owodwa ubudala. Futhi isithombe sizovusa kuphela ububele, uma kungenjalo ngemininingwane eyodwa emincane - ukubhoboza kwakubukisa ebusweni bengane. “Ngingumama, uyindodakazi yami, ngakho ngikhululekile ukwenza noma yini engiyifunayo naye! Ngizomnqumela aze abe neminyaka engu-18, ngoba ngamzala, ungowami,” u-Enedin wasayina ikhadi. Yebo, izinkulumo ezingezinhle ngokushesha zatheleka kumama. Othile wangabaza impilo yakhe yengqondo, abaningi bathembisa ukuphendukela esitokisini futhi baphuce umama ongenandaba namalungelo omzali. Nokho, akuzange kufike ekufezekeni kwezinsongo. Ngemuva kokuthi u-Enedina Vance echaze ngokushesha ukuthi isithombe siyi-montage, futhi umbhalo uwukucasula okumsulwa. Owesifazane wayefuna ukudonsela ukunakekela enkingeni yobuqotho obungokomzimba bezingane. Abazali akufanele banqumele ingane yabo ukuthi ingazidweba, ibhoboze izindlebe zayo noma isoka. Okubuhlungu ukuthi akubona bonke omama abakuqonda lokhu. Futhi bayaqhubeka besebenzisa izingane zabo ukuze bazijabulise bona, bengenandaba nanoma iyiphi indlela ngenhlalakahle nesifiso somntwana.
U-Andrea Dalzell ujabule ukwabelana ngezithombe zoshintsho lwakhe
Cha, manje ngeke sikhulume ngendlela omama abagcona ngayo amantombazane ukuze bawine imincintiswano yonobuhle. Akusekho muntu ojova i-Botox, nakuba izingubo ezihlanyayo nezimonyo zisenayo indawo. Nokho, izinto azibi ngcono lapho umama enaka ngokwengeziwe ukubukeka kwakhe futhi ngenxa yobuhle bakhe ukulungele ukulambisa izingane. Yilokhu okwenziwa owesifazane oyiNgisi u-Andrea Dalzell. Lona wesifazane wayesaba kakhulu ukuguga kangangokuthi waqala ukuhlehlisa ukuhlinzwa kwepulasitiki cishe eminyakeni engu-15 edlule. Futhi kubonakala sengathi akukho okubi. Kodwa u-Andrea ngokwakhe akazange asebenze, futhi waqoqa imali yokuhlinzwa kusuka ezinzuzweni zezingane ezine. Njengoba ipulasitiki iyinjabulo ebizayo, sonke lesi sikhathi umndeni wawuhlala ngaphansi kwezimo zomnotho ezinzima. Babedla kanye ngosuku ukuze yonke iphawundi eyengeziwe ifakwe endaweni eyigugu yengulube. U-Andrea usecishe wafinyelela umgomo wakhe, usevele enokuphakanyiswa kwezihlathi, ukuphakamisa amashiya, i-mammoplasty. Owesifazane ngeke ayeke, kodwa kuzoba nzima kakhulu kuye ukulondoloza: manje uthola izinzuzo zengane eyodwa kuphela. Nakuba, mhlawumbe, ngeke ayibone le mali. Inhlangano yabakhokhintela, iTaxpayers’ Alliance, ebheka ukukhokhelwa kwezenhlalakahle, ithukuthele igane unwabu ngesikhathi ithola ukuthi le mali ibisetshenziswa ngani. Futhi ngephupho elisha, u-Andrea kuzodingeka aqoqe isikhathi eside kakhulu.