Ukuphila okunensayo kuwubuciko bokuphila obuhlanganisa ukwehlisa ijubane nsuku zonke ukuze wazise kangcono izinto futhi ujabule. Le nhlangano yenzeka ezinhlakeni eziningi zempilo: ukudla okuhamba kancane, ukukhulisa izingane kancane, ibhizinisi eliphuzayo, ukuya ocansini kancane… Ungakusebenzisa kanjani nsuku zonke? Ziyini izinzuzo zayo? UCindy Chapelle, isazi sezinkanyezi nombhali webhulogi iLa Slow Life usitshela kabanzi ngokuhamba kancane.

"Akukona ukuthi siphila ku-100 ngehora ukuthi siphila 100%, ngokuphambene nalokho", kubhuqa uCindy Chapelle. Kungesisekelo salokhu kuqaphela lapho sibona khona ukuthi kubalulekile namuhla ukunciphisa indlela yethu yokuphila ukuze sichume. Lokhu kubizwa ngokuthi ukunyakaza kancane. Yazalwa ngo-1986, lapho intatheli yokudla uCarlo Pétrini enza ukudla okuhamba kancane e-Italy ukulwa nokudla okusheshayo. Kusukela lapho, ukunyakaza okuhamba kancane kuye kwasakazekela kwezinye izindawo (umzali, ucansi, ibhizinisi, izimonyo, ezokuvakasha, njll.) ukuze kube ukuphila okuhamba kancane ngokujwayelekile. Kodwa yini ebangela lobuSheshi obusemfashinini? “Impilo engasheshi imayelana nokuzinza, uthathe igxathu emuva kokwenzayo nakulokho okuhlangabezanayo nokuzibuza ukuthi yini ebalulekile kuwe. Umqondo ukubeka phambili ikhwalithi ngaphezu kobuningi empilweni yakho. Ngalokhu, kubalulekile ukuthi sinciphise isigqi sethu ukuze singazizwa sikhungathekile futhi singakhohlwa ”. Qaphela, ukuphila kancane akuhlangene nobuvila. Inhloso akukona ukuthi umile kodwa ukwehlisa izinga.

Ukungena empilweni ehamba kancane akusho ukwenza izinguquko ezinkulu empilweni. Lezi yizenzo ezincane, ukuthinta okuncane kanye nemikhuba, okuthi, uma kuthathwe ndawonye, ​​kancane kancane iguqule indlela esiphila ngayo. “Awuyiguquli ngokuphelele impilo yakho ngezinguquko ezinkulu, kungaba nzima kakhulu ukuyibeka endaweni nokulandela ngokuhamba kwesikhathi”, kuphawula udokotela wezifo zenhliziyo. Ingabe ulingeka ngokuphila okuhamba kancane kodwa ungazi ukuthi uzoqala kuphi? Nazi izibonelo ezilula zemikhuba “yempilo ephansi” ongayithatha:

• Ziphathe ngohambo lokunciphisa ukucindezeleka lapho uphuma emsebenzini. “Ukuba ne-decompression airlock uma uphuma emsebenzini nangaphambi kokuhlangana nomndeni wakho kukuvumela ukuthi uhlanganise konke okwenzeka phakathi nosuku. Yisikhathi sokuphuma emsebenzini futhi uzenze utholakalele impilo yomndeni ”, kuchaza uCindy Chapelle.
• Zinike isikhathi sokuphefumula ngesikhathi sekhefu esikhundleni sokuhlala uvaliwe noma ugqolozele ikhompuyutha yakho, isemishi esandleni sakho. “Ukuphefumula akukona nje ukuphumela ngaphandle, kodwa ukuzinza nokwazisa imisindo, iphunga nokubukeka kwemvelo. Silalela izinyoni, amagatsha ezihlahla enyakaza emoyeni, siphefumula utshani obusanda kugundwa… ”, weluleka uchwepheshe.
• Zindla. “Ukusebenzisa imizuzu emi-5 kuye kweyi-10 ngosuku ekuzindleni kuyisinyathelo sokuqala esiholela ekuphileni okunensayo. Ekuseni, sihlala phansi futhi sivale amehlo ethu ukuze sizindle, sithathe isibikezelo sethu sezulu sangaphakathi. Siqala usuku ngendlela enokuthula ”.
• Lindela izinto kusengaphambili. “Ukuba nesimiso sakusasa ngosuku olulandelayo kukuvumela ukuba uhlele kahle usuku lwakho futhi ungazizwa ucindezelekile. Ukwazi okufanele ukulindele kugwema ukucindezelwa okungadingekile nge-D-Day ”.
• Khawulela ukusebenzisa kwethu amanethiwekhi omphakathi futhi uthathe igxathu lokuhlehla kokuqukethwe okusakazwa lapho. “Angizami ukuba noma ngenze into efanayo nabanye, ngiyazibuza ukuthi yini engiyidingayo ukuze ngijabule”, kugcizelela uCindy Chapelle.

Ukuphila okunensayo kuwubuciko bokuphila, kungasetshenziswa kuzo zonke izindawo.

La ukudla kancane

Ngokungafani nokudla okusheshayo, ukudla okunensayo kuhlanganisa ukudla okunempilo nokuzinika isikhathi sokupheka. “Akusho ukupheka isidlo esimnandi! Uvele uzinike isikhathi sokukhetha imikhiqizo yakho kahle futhi uyipheke ngendlela elula. Ukwenza nomndeni okungenani kanye ngesonto kungcono kakhulu ”, kusikisela uCindy Chapelle.

Le slow parenting et la slow school

Uma unezingane futhi usebenza, ijubane livame ukuphithizela. Ingozi kubazali iwukwenza izinto ngokuzenzakalelayo ngaphandle kokuthatha isikhathi sokububona ngokugcwele ubuzali babo. “Ukuba ngumzali ongasheshi kuhlanganisa nokuchitha isikhathi esiningi udlala nezingane zakho, uzilalele, ngenkathi ufuna ukuzinikeza ukuzimela okwengeziwe nsuku zonke. Iyadedela ngokungafani ne-hyperparentity ”, ithuthukisa i-sophrologist. Umkhuba wesikole ohamba kancane nawo uyathuthuka, ikakhulukazi izikole ezithuthukayo ezinikeza ezinye izindlela zokufunda kunalezo ezisetshenziswa ezikoleni “zendabuko”: ukubuyekeza ukugreda, ukuphikisana ekilasini ngendikimba, gwema “ngenhliziyo”. ”…

Ibhizinisi elinensayo

Ukuhamba kancane kwebhizinisi kusho ukusetha imikhuba eyenza ibhalansi yempilo yomsebenzi. Ngokuqondile, isisebenzi sivumela amakhefu ambalwa osukwini lwaso ukuze sithole umoya ohlanzekile, ukuphefumula, ukuphuza itiye. Futhi, ukungenzi imisebenzi eminingi kuyisici sebhizinisi elihamba kancane, njengoba lingabheki kakhulu ebhokisini lakho leposi (uma kungenzeka). Umgomo uwukukhipha, ngangokunokwenzeka, noma yini engase ibangele ukucindezeleka okungadingekile emsebenzini. Ebhizinisini elihamba kancane, kukhona nokuphatha okunensayo, okumema abaphathi ukuthi bahole ngendlela ekhululekile futhi eguquguqukayo ukuze bangacindezeli abasebenzi babo futhi bakhulise umkhiqizo wabo ngokungaqondile. Eminyakeni yamuva nje, izindlela eziningi zibekiwe ngale ndlela: ukusebenza ngocingo, amahora amahhala, ukusethwa kwezikhathi zokuzilibazisa nezemidlalo emsebenzini, njll.

Le slow sex

Ukusebenza nokuncintisana kuphazamise ubulili bethu, kwadala ingcindezi, izinto eziyinkimbinkimbi, kanye neziyaluyalu zocansi. Ukuzijayeza ucansi oluhamba kancane kusho ukwenza uthando ngokuqwashisa okugcwele, ukhetha ukwehlisa ijubane, ukuzwa ngokuphelele yonke imizwa, ukuqukatha amandla akho ezocansi futhi ngaleyo ndlela uthole injabulo enkulu. Lokhu kubizwa ngokuthi i-tantrism. "Ukwenza uthando kancane kukuvumela ukuthi uthole umzimba womlingani wakho okokuqala ngqa, ukuze unikeze umbono wakho ngendawo ethintiwe".

Ukuphila okunensayo kuletha izinzuzo eziningi ezingokomzimba nezingokwengqondo. “Ukwehlisa ijubane kunomthelela omkhulu ekukhuleni kwethu siqu nasenjabulweni yethu. Kuthinta impilo yethu ngoba ngokuqinisa inhlalakahle yethu usuku nosuku, sinciphisa ukucindezeleka kwethu, sithuthukise ukulala kwethu futhi sidle kangcono ”, yazisa uchwepheshe. Kulabo abangase babuze umbuzo, ukuphila kancane kuhambisana ngokuphelele nempilo yedolobha, inqobo nje uma uzikhuza. Ukuze usebenzise ukuphila okunensayo, kufanele ufune ngoba kudinga ukuthi ubuyekeze izinto eziza kuqala kuwe ukuze ubuyele ezintweni eziyisisekelo (imvelo, ukudla okunempilo, ukuphumula, njll.). Kodwa uma usuqalile, kuhle kakhulu kangangokuthi awukwazi ukubuyela emuva!