Muva nje, izingane ezinzima zinikezwe ukuxilongwa "okunemfashini" - ukuphikiswa okuphikisayo. Isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo u-Erina White uthi lokhu akuyona into edlula "indaba esabekayo" yanamuhla, elula ukuchaza noma yikuphi ukuziphatha okuyinkinga. Lokhu kuxilongwa kwethusa abazali abaningi futhi kubenza balahle ithemba.
Njengoba isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo u-Erina White siphawula, eminyakeni yamuva nje, bayanda abazali abakhathazeke ngokuthi ingane yabo ihlushwa yi-oppositional defiant disorder (ODD). I-American Psychiatric Association ichaza i-ODD njengentukuthelo, ukucasuka, inkani, ukuziphindiselela, kanye nokungahloniphi.
Ngokuvamile, abazali bazovuma ukuthi uthisha noma udokotela womndeni uthe ingane yabo ingase ibe ne-ODD, futhi lapho befunda incazelo ku-inthanethi, bathole ukuthi ezinye zezimpawu ziyahambisana. Badidekile futhi bakhathazekile, futhi lokhu kuyaqondakala.
Ilebula ye-OIA, enamathiselwe ngokuthi “abafisela okuhle”, yenza omama nobaba bacabange ukuthi ingane yabo igula ngendlela eyingozi, kanti bona ngokwabo bangabazali abangenamsebenzi. Ngaphezu kwalokho, ukuxilongwa kokuqala okunjalo kwenza kube nzima ukuqonda ukuthi ulaka luvelaphi nokuthi izinkinga zokuziphatha zingasuswa kanjani. Kubi kuwo wonke umuntu: abazali nezingane. Ngaleso sikhathi, i-OVR ayilutho nje “indaba ethusayo” evamile enganqotshwa.
Okokuqala, kuyadingeka ukususa inhlamba "eyihlazo". Ingabe othile uthe ingane yakho ine-ODD? Kulungile. Mabasho noma yini baze bathathwe ngokuthi ochwepheshe, lokhu akusho ukuthi ingane imbi. “Eminyakeni engamashumi amabili yokuzijwayeza, angikaze ngihlangane nezingane ezimbi,” kusho uWhite. “Eqinisweni, iningi labo liba nolaka noma ngendelelo ngezikhathi ezithile. Futhi konke kuhamba kahle kini, ningabazali abavamile. Konke kuzohamba kahle - kuwe nakumntwana.
Isinyathelo sesibili ukuqonda ukuthi yini ngempela ekukhathazayo. Kwenzekani - esikoleni noma ekhaya? Mhlawumbe ingane yenqaba ukulalela abantu abadala noma inobutha nefunda nabo ekilasini. Yebo, lokhu kuziphatha kuyakhungathekisa, futhi awufuni ukukwenza, kodwa kuyalungiseka.
Isinyathelo sesithathu futhi mhlawumbe esibaluleke kakhulu ukuphendula umbuzo othi "kungani?" umbuzo. Kungani ingane iziphatha ngale ndlela? Izizathu ezibalulekile zitholakala cishe kuzo zonke izingane.
Ngesikhathi ingane ikhula, abantu ababenethuba lokumsiza bayamesaba.
Abazali abacabanga ngezimo nezehlakalo okungenzeka zibangele ukuziphatha okuyisixwayiso kungenzeka bathole okuthile okubalulekile. Ngokwesibonelo, ukuqonda ukuthi ingane iba engabekezeleleki ikakhulukazi lapho usuku lwesikole lungasethwanga ngokucacile. Mhlawumbe isiqhwaga esithile simkhathaze ngaphezu kokujwayelekile. Noma ezizwa engajabule ngoba ezinye izingane zifunde kangcono kunaye. Esikoleni, ngenkuthalo wagcina ubuso obuqondile, kodwa lapho nje ebuyela ekhaya futhi wazithola esephakathi kwezihlobo zakhe, endaweni ephephile, yonke imizwa enzima yaphuma. Empeleni, ingane ibhekene nokukhathazeka okukhulu, kodwa okwamanje akakwazi ukubhekana nakho.
Kunezizathu ezingabangwa kakhulu yizinto eziye zabhekana nazo mathupha njengoba kwenzeka endaweni. Mhlawumbe umama nobaba bayahlukana. Noma umkhulu wakho omthandayo wagula. Noma ubaba wezempi futhi usanda kuthunyelwa kwelinye izwe. Lezi yizinkinga ezinkulu ngempela.
Uma ubunzima buhlobene nomunye wabazali, bangase bazizwe benecala noma bazivikele. “Ngihlale ngikhumbuza abantu ukuthi noma nini senza konke okusemandleni ethu. Ngisho noma inkinga ingenakuxazululwa ngaso leso sikhathi, ukuyikhomba kakade kusho ukususa ilebula enamathiselwe, yeka ukufuna izimpawu ze-pathology futhi uqale ukulungisa ukuziphatha kwezingane, "kugcizelela i-psychotherapist.
Isinyathelo sesine nesokugcina ukubuyela ezimpawini ezilaphekayo. Ungayisiza ingane yakho ukuba ibhekane nobudlova ngokuyifundisa ukuqonda imizwa yayo. Bese uqhubekela phambili usebenzele ukuzithiba futhi kancane kancane uthuthukise ukuqaphela kwengqondo nomzimba. Ukwenza lokhu, kunemidlalo yevidiyo ekhethekile, edlalwa izingane ezifunda ukusheshisa nokunciphisa ukushaya kwenhliziyo yazo. Ngale ndlela, bayaqonda ukuthi kwenzekani emzimbeni lapho imizwa enobudlova ithatha amandla, futhi bafunde ukuzola ngokuzenzakalelayo. Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi yiliphi isu olikhethayo, isihluthulelo sempumelelo wukusungula izinto, isimo sengqondo sobungane nokuzwelana nengane nokuphikelela kwakho.
Ukuziphatha okuyinkinga kulula ukukuchaza ku-OVR. Kuyadabukisa ukuthi lokhu kuxilongwa kungalimaza impilo yengane. OVR kuqala. Khona-ke ukuziphatha okuphambene nomphakathi. Ngesikhathi ingane ikhula, abantu ababenethuba lokumsiza bayamesaba. Ngenxa yalokho, lezi zingane zinikezwa inkambo yokwelashwa enzima kakhulu: esikhungweni sokuhlunyeleliswa kwezimilo.
Ngokweqile, usho? Maye, lokhu kwenzeka kaningi. Bonke odokotela, othisha nodokotela kufanele bakhulise ama-horizons abo futhi, ngaphezu kokuziphatha okubi kwengane, babone indawo ehlala kuyo. Indlela ehlangene izoletha izinzuzo eziningi: izingane, abazali kanye nomphakathi wonke.
Mayelana Nombhali: U-Erina White uyisazi sokusebenza kwengqondo sasemtholampilo e-Boston Children's Hospital, i-internist, kanye ne-Master of Public Health.