EYekaterinburg, phakathi nekamu lezingane e-Yeltsin Centre, isivakashi endlini yangasese yabesifazane sabona isithombe esibi: isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo sasigeza umlomo wengane ngensipho. Umfana wayekhala, kuphuma amagwebu emlonyeni.
I-Lego Camp ivuliwe ngesikhathi se-Spring Break. Nokho, kwelinye lamakilasi kwaba nesigameko “esaqhuma” i-Internet. Intatheli u-Olga Tatarnikova, owayengufakazi kulo mcimbi, wabhala ngaye ku-Facebook:
“Ingabe umnakekeli angaphoqa ingane ukuthi igeze umlomo ngensipho namanzi? Angazi. Kodwa uma ngibuka umfana okhalayo ekhihliza amagwebu manje, inhliziyo yami yopha. Kwama uthisha eduze kwakhe wathi inhlamba enjengesigaxa sobulongwe kumele igezwe. Umfana wabhonga, wathi usewashile, futhi wamenza waphinda futhi. “
Umufi kwakunguSasha oneminyaka engu-8 ubudala. Usuku Lwabesifazane lucele izazi zokusebenza kwengqondo ukuthi ziphawule ngabahlanganyeli endabeni engathandeki.
Umama womfana u-Olga wakhuluma ome kakhulu:
– Isigameko sesiphelile.
Ngekhefu lasentwasahlobo, abafana babehlanganyela "ekamu le-Lego"
Elena Volkova, omele Yeltsin Center:
– Yebo, isimo esinjalo senzeka. Umfana owayefunda “ekamu lethu laseLego” wasebenzisa inhlamba izinsuku ezimbalwa. Abakwazanga ukumthonya ngamazwi, ngakho uthisha u-Olga Amelyanenko, ongeyena isisebenzi saseYeltsin Center, waphelezela umfana waya endlini yokugezela wamcela ukuba ageze ubuso nezindebe ngensipho. Bamchazela ukuthi lokhu kwenzelwa “ukugeza” inhlamba futhi angaphindi.
Kodwa sesike saba nengxoxo nothisha, sacela ukuthi singakwenzi lokhu ezindongeni zethu. Nangempela sixoxile nomama womfana ukuqinisekisile ukuthi indodana yakhe ithuka izanya. Futhi akacasulwa uthisha, ngoba uthemba ukuthi lokhu kuzosiza umfana ukuba angasebenzisi ulimi olubi, ngoba umama ngokwakhe akakwazi ukubhekana nakho. Ngemuva kwalesi sigameko wafika eqenjini waqhubeka nezifundo zakhe. Lapho simbuza ukuthi ucabangani ngalesi simo, umbuzo wakhe wokuqala wawuthi: “Isiphi isimo?” Umfana akambambeleli igqubu u-Olga.
U-Olga Amelyanenko uyisazi sokusebenza kwengqondo esifanayo… Unenguqulo ehluke ngokuphelele yalokho okwenzekile. Utshele i-Woman's Day ukuthi isimo esichazwe yintatheli sasingajwayelekile - umfana akazange akhale noma abe novalo. U-Olga unobudlelwano obuhle nonina noSasha:
Sinokuqeqeshwa kweminyaka engu-6 kuya kwengu-11, lapho sihlaziya khona izimfanelo zomuntu ezihlukene: umusa, isibindi, udumo, ukuzethemba. Amakilasi aqhutshwa ngamaholide ezingane. Namuhla bekuwusuku lwesithathu. Futhi phakathi nalezi zinsuku ezintathu kuza kimi umfana omuhle okhuluma inhlamba. Hhayi ngokuzwakalayo nasobala, kodwa ngokufihla. Ngakho uzama ukuzigomela.
Namuhla wabhala inhlamba ephepheni waqala ukuyibonisa ezinye izingane. Ngayikhipha futhi ngaqala ukuchaza ukuthi amagama angcolile angamagama angcolile "udoti" inkulumo, abe nomthelela omubi kumuntu - ungangenwa ngisho negciwane (Ngingumelaphi wezinganekwane, ngakho-ke ngisebenzisa isingathekiso). Ngengeza ngokuthi lokhu kubi kangangokuthi ngisho nami ngingangenwa yizifo, ngoba ngiwezwa la mazwi.
Ingxoxo yethu yezwakala kanje: “Ingabe uhlala emphakathini ohloniphekile?” - "Yebo, kulungile." - "Ingabe ungumfana ohloniphekile?" - "Yebo!" - "Futhi abafana abahloniphekile emphakathini ohloniphekile akufanele bathuke."
Saya endlini yokugezela savumelana ngokuthi sizogeza izandla zethu kahle ngensipho, bese sigeza ubuso. Futhi ngisho nenani elincane le-foam sizogeza "ukungcola" olimini.
Umfana akazange akhale, akazange abe nokufutheka - ngiyaqala ukuzwa lokhu kuwe. Yebo akajabulanga ukuthi ubanjwe ethuka inhlamba, manje sekumele “azigeze”. Kodwa ukube bekungokumamatheka, ubengeke afunde isifundo emlandweni. Futhi ngakho wangilalela, wavuma futhi wenza konke ngokwakhe. Emva kwalokho wangicela ukuthi ngingatsheli muntu ngale ndaba. Futhi ngiyaxolisa kakhulu ukuthi manje kufanele ngephule isifungo sami.
Ngemuva kwalesi sigameko, sabuyela eqenjini ndawonye, ingane yaphendukela kimi, sakha izibalo futhi sadweba ndawonye. Sahlala singabangane naye. Umfana muhle, futhi unomama othandekayo. Saxoxa naye, futhi wavuma ukuthi banenkinga efanayo esikoleni, futhi uthemba ukuthi indlela yami izosiza.
Insipho yindlela eyodwa. Uma othile engayithandi insipho, sebenzisa umuthi wokuxubha kanye nebhulashi. Into eyinhloko ukuhlala umngane wengane, ukuba ohlangothini lwakhe. Bonisa ukuthi awumthethisi, kodwa usize. Khona-ke isibopho sakho sizokhula sibe namandla.
USuku Lwabesifazane lucele abanye ochwepheshe bengqondo yezingane ababili ukuthi baphawule ngalesi simo.
Isazi sengqondo Galina Zaripova:
Ngiyasihlola isimo esichazwe kwabezindaba - asazi ukuthi empeleni kwenzekani lapho. Iqiniso lokuthi lokhu akukho emthethweni - nakanjani! SineKhodi Yokuphatha ehlola lesi senzo njengokuhlukumeza ngokomzwelo nangokomzimba uma ngabe ingane ikhale ngempela futhi icela ukuyeka.
Lena indlela engasebenzi kahle yokulumula umfana ekuthukeni. Konke okuzokhishwa ingane eneminyaka engu-8 kokuhlangenwe nakho okwenzekile: “Ngalo muntu, awukwazi ukuthuka, kungenjalo ngizokuthola. Uma umama ngokwakhe ezama ukukhuluma nengane, kodwa lokhu akuzange kusize, khona-ke umbuzo uphakama mayelana nesimo sengxoxo. Ngokuvamile, izingxoxo ezinjalo zingokwemvelo, lapho umuntu omdala, esikhundleni sakhe, ezama ukuchazela umuntu omncane ukuthi kufanele aphile kanjani. Futhi ku-psychology yengane kukhona umthetho olula - udinga ukunikeza okuthile ngokubuyisela. Kungani ingane isebenzisa inhlamba – iphinda ukuziphatha komunye umuntu? Iveza intukuthelo noma injabulo? Uma lokhu sekucacile, fundisa ingane yakho ukuveza imizwa efanele ngendlela efanele. Mhlawumbe lena yindlela yakhe yokuxhumana, futhi akazi ukuthi akwenze kanjani ngenye indlela.
Kungaba usizo nokuba nengxoxo nezinye izingane zale nkambu. Kumele ubabuze ukuthi bazizwa kanjani ngokuthi phakathi kwabo kukhona umuntu othuka inhlamba, mhlawumbe lokhu kungamthinta umfana. Futhi, yiqiniso, ekuqaleni, ekamu, kwakudingeka bachaze imithetho yokuziphatha, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi babeyi-banal kangakanani.
Isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo uNatella Kolobova:
Kubonakala sengathi ufakazi wesifazane (Olga Tatarnikova) walimala kakhulu kulesi simo. Asazi ukuthi yini engalimaza futhi engeke ilimaze ingane. Isimo esisodwa futhi esifanayo somuntu sizoba "esibi kangakanani ukuhlukumezeka", futhi uzoya kuma-psychotherapists nayo yonke impilo yakhe. Esinye isimo esifanayo sizophuma ngomoya ophansi, ezithela othulini. Ngazi into eyodwa ngokuqinisekile: ezimweni ezinzima, kufanele kube nomuntu omdala othembekile oseduze ozokwazi: ukuchaza lesi simo; qukatha (okungukuthi, ukumelana nemizwa enamandla yengane, iphile naye); ukusekela. Umfana, ovame ukuphula imithetho evamile, ngaleyo ndlela "ucela" ukuba khona komuntu omdala oqinile ozombeka imingcele eqinile, imithetho kanye nezidingo, kodwa angakwazi ukuthembela kuye. Umama nalokhu, ngokusobala, akahle kakhulu kukho. Ngakho-ke, indima enjalo ingadlalwa isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo, uthisha, umqeqeshi.
Ngakho-ke, lapha isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo sasebenza njengomlomo wezinkambiso zomphakathi. Nakuba, esikhundleni sakhe, bengingeke ngikuphoqe ukuba ugeze umlomo wakho ngensipho. Brr … ngabe ngiqhamuke nokunye, isibonelo, ngabe ngethule uhlelo lwezinhlawulo zomlingani eqenjini.