Singakhuluma nezingane ngezocansi ngaphandle kwezithiyo
Abazali: Kufiseleka ukuthi uneminyaka emingaki ukhulume ngale ndaba?
USandra Franrenet: Imibuzo yezingane ezisacathula mayelana nocansi ifika eminyakeni engaba ngu-3, zinesithakazelo esikhulu emizimbeni yazo kanye neyabobulili obuhlukile. Bavame ukuzama ukubona abazali babo benqunu, ukuqonda umehluko… Kodwa lokho kungafika kamuva, akukho mthetho, konke kuncike enganeni. Abazali banamuhla bazimisele ukwenza umsebenzi wabo kahle, bazizwa “bephethe umsebenzi wokufundisa” futhi ngokuvamile bamagange kakhulu ukukhuluma ngayo yonke into. Akudingeki ukuthi sisukume! Into esemqoka akuyona ukulindela imibuzo, ukubavumela ukuba beze, ukuhlonipha ukuthuthukiswa kanye nesikhashana somuntu siqu somntanakho. Uma sikhuluma ngayo lapho ingane ingaceli futhi ingakulungele ukuzwa lolu hlobo lolwazi, kunengozi yokudala ukushaqeka okungaba ukuhlukumezeka. Lapho omncane ebuza "Kwenzani uthando?" », Simnika impendulo kodwa ngaphandle kokungena emininingwaneni. Singasho isibonelo: lokhu yilokho okwenziwa abantu abadala ngoba bethandana, ngoba kuyabajabulisa futhi bafuna ukukwenza. Uma ubulili bungafanele bube yinhlamba, kufanele sihlale sihlakaniphile ngoba kuyimfihlo yethu, sinikeza izimpendulo, kodwa asisho konke.
Ugcizelela ukubaluleka kokwenza isimo sokwethembana, ngani?
SF : Izingane zifuna ukwazi ngokwemvelo futhi ilukuluku lobulili lingokwemvelo, kodwa ukuze ingane ikwazi ukukhuluma ngokuzenzakalelayo, kudingeka ibe nomuzwa wokuthi enkulumweni yomkhaya wayo ivunyelwe kuzo zonke izindaba ezimkhathazayo, kuhlanganise nobulili. . Lapho etshela okuthile, isibonelo ukuthi umngane wakhe u-Leo ubonise isithombe sowesifazane onqunu ngesikhathi sokuphumula futhi ezizwa enamahloni, uzoqonda ukuthi imibuzo ngocansi, "ezinqeni", ayivunyelwe. . Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi yini ayicelayo, kumelwe abe nomuzwa wokuthi akukho ukugandeleleka noma ukwahlulela ngakuwe. Ukutholakala kocansi, kwenziwa esikoleni nezinye izingane, nabafowabo nodadewabo abakhulu abakhuluma izinto "ezingcolile", ngokubuka amaphosta emgwaqweni kanye nezikhangiso ezithile ezishisayo kakhulu kumabonakude, ngezinganekwane kanye nezithombe zopopayi. “Indodakazi yami eneminyaka engu-5 yangibuza ngolunye usuku ukuthi kungani I-Donkey Skin ibaleke. Ngamtshela ukuthi uyabaleka ngoba engafuni ukushada noyise. Indodakazi yami, imangale kakhulu, yanezela: “Ngizoshada nobaba kamuva, singahlala sobathathu ndawonye!” Kwanginika ithuba elihle lokukhuluma naye nge-Oedipus nokwenqatshelwa kokulala nesihlobo.
Indlela yokuthola amagama afanele wengane?
SF : Ukukhuluma ngocansi ezinganeni akusho ukukhuluma ngocansi lwabantu abadala ngendlela engahluziwe. Abadingi silulumagama sobuchwepheshe noma izifundo zokufundisa ngocansi. Singabachazela ukuthi abathandanayo babelana ngesisa, ukuqabulana, ukwanga nobumnandi. Lapho bebuza ukuthi “Sizenza kanjani izingane? Abafuni imininingwane ngomklamo. Ukutshela ukuthi inzalo encane kababa kanye nenzalo kamama kuyahlangana ukwenza ingane, futhi ingane izokhula esizalweni sikamama ize izalwe yanele. Okuthakasela ingane ukwazi ukuthi iyisithelo sothando lwabazali bayo, bake bahlangana futhi bathandana futhi indaba yakhe le.
Singasebenzisa amagama afana no-zizi, zézette, foufoune, kiki?
SF: Singasebenzisa amagama afana nenyoni encane, ipipi, iqhude… ukuze sichaze ubulili bendoda kanye ne-zézette, imbali, i-zigounette ukukhomba ubulili bowesifazane. Kodwa kubalulekile ukuthi ingane iwazi namagama umthondo, amasende, ingquza kanye nencazelo yawo ngqo. Izinqe azihlangene nezitho zangasese, ngakho leli gama kumele lisetshenziswe ngobuhlakani.
Kuthiwani uma bebuza amagama anjengokuthi “porn” noma “fellatio”?
I-SF Toddlers ngesinye isikhathi ibuyisa ngaphandle isilulumagama esingahloselwe bona nhlobo. Okokuqala okumele ukwenze ukuthola ukuthi baqonde ukuthini ngalokho, ubabuze ukuthi kusho ukuthini. Ukuqala olwazini lwakhe akumvumeli nje ukuthi angasho okungaphezu kwalokho afuna ukukwazi, kodwa futhi anikeze izimpendulo ezihambisana neminyaka yakhe. Ngokusobala ngeke simnikeze imininingwane yobuchwepheshe ngocansi lomlomo. Kumele umtshele nje ukuthi lezi yizinto abantu abadala abazenzayo uma bethanda ngaphandle kokuchaza ukuthi kuyini. Ungamtshela nokuthi nizoxoxa ngayo kamuva, lapho esekhulile.
Kuthiwani uma bebona izithombe ezingavuthiwe kuyi-Internet bengaqondile?
SF Wonke umuntu uyazi ngezigigaba zezingane ezichofoza izithombe “zemibinjana” futhi zihlale ezingosini zocansi, noma zichayeke kuma-DVD ocansi kuma-newsagents angazibeki phezulu. Okokuqala okumele ukwenze wukuqinisekisa ingane esathuswe yilokhu ekubonile: “Ukuthola kunyanyisa, ungakhathazeki, kujwayelekile ukuthi uthuke, Akulona iphutha lakho. Lena imikhuba eyenziwa ngabanye abantu abadala, kodwa hhayi bonke abantu abadala. Akudingekile ukuba sikwenze! Uma usumdala, uzokwenza okufunayo, ungakhathazeki, akusona isibopho. “
Ungamxwayisa kanjani omncane ngokumelene nama-pedophiles?
SF : Ukuxwayisa ngengozi kuhle, kodwa senza "ukukhanya" ukuvimbela. Abazali abakhuluma ngakho kakhulu badlulisela izinkathazo zabo enganeni yabo, bethulula ukwesaba kwabo kuye. Uma beziqinisekisa, abayisizi ingane yabo, kunalokho. Izixwayiso zakudala, njengokuthi “Awukhulumi nomuntu omdala ongamazi!” Uma sikunikeza uswidi, awuwuthathi! Uma sisondela kuwe, ngitshele ngokushesha! Zanele. Namuhla kukhona izinsolo ezivamile kubantu abadala, kufanele siqaphe, kodwa singangeni ku-paranoia. Indlela engcono kakhulu yokugwema izinkinga ukukhuthaza ingane yakho ukuthi ikutshele okwenzeka ngokuphindaphindiwe, ngokuzethemba.
Ingabe ukhona umlayezo obalulekile okufanele udluliselwe ezinganeni?
SF : Ngokubona kwami, kubalulekile ukufundisa ingane yakho ngokushesha ngangokunokwenzeka ukuthi umzimba wakhe ungowakhe, ukuthi akekho onelungelo lokuwuthinta, ngaphandle kwakhe nabazali bakhe. Kufanele umfundise ukugcina ubumfihlo bakhe, umkhuthaze ukuthi azigeze ngokushesha ngangokunokwenzeka, futhi uze ucele imvume yakhe yokuthatha isithombe futhi athumele isithombe sakhe odongeni lwakho lwe-Facebook, isibonelo.
Uma ehlanganisa esemncane kakhulu ukuthi isithombe sakhe njengomzimba wakhe singesakhe, ukuthi akekho ongasilahla ngaphandle kwesivumelwano sakhe, uzokwazi ukuzihlonipha yena nomunye. Lokhu kuzoba nomthelela omuhle endleleni yakhe yokuphila ubulili bakhe ebusheni nasebudaleni. Futhi mancane kakhulu amathuba okuthi ngokuhamba kwesikhathi abe yisisulu se-cyber-stalker.