Okuqukethwe
Noma ngabe singobani, sonke sibeka engcupheni yokwakha ubudlelwano obuthiwa bunobuthi. I-American Psychiatric Association ilinganisela ukuthi inani labantu lilonke lingabandakanya kuze kufike ku-2,5% ubuntu obushubile.
Ngingakugqugquzela kuphela ukuthi uthathe lesi simo ngokungathi sína ngoba ukubonwa kodokotela bengqondo imvamisa akunasikhalazo: umuntu ongaba yisisulu sakhe, ngaphandle kokungajwayelekile, akasoze aguquke. Ngakho-ke kubalulekile ukwazi ukuthi ungababona kanjani laba bantu abayingozi enhlalakahleni yakho ukuze wenze ngokufanelekile.
Lokhu kudinga kakhulu ngoba kwenzeka kaningi ukuthi umuntu ahlupheke ngaphandle kokukuqaphela.
Ngakho-ke, ubona kanjani ukuziphatha okunobuthi? Yiziphi izimpawu ezingalokothi ziqambe amanga? Nanka amacala amathathu ahlukene obuthi, engiwacabanga njengokuphazamisa kakhulu, achazwe ngamaqiniso avumela ukubazi.
Ubuntu bokuhlanya
Isici salo esiyinhloko ukuhlupheka ngokungathembani ngokweqile ngokweqile. Abantu abanalesi sifo bahlala bekholelwa ukuthi bashushiswa izitha.
Ngalesi sizathu, bavame ukutolika ukuziphatha kwabanye njengokubi, kwesinye isikhathi noma ngabe bathola ukunconywa.
Ngokushesha nje lapho abantu abaphazamisayo bezwa ukuthi boniwe, bathambekele ekubambeleni igqubu isikhathi eside kakhulu. Bangase bathathe nezinyathelo ezinqala zokudambisa intukuthelo yabo, njengokuthatha izinyathelo zomthetho.
Kuyabonakala futhi ukuthi banobunzima obukhulu bokuzinikela ngenxa yokwesaba ukukhashelwa, ngoba kubo akekho noyedwa ofanele ukwethenjwa.
Imiphumela ongayithola ingakubangela amahloni kakhulu. Njengoba isimo sakhe simenza ahoxe kuye, i-paranoid ilindele ukuthi nawe wenze njalo.
Ngaphezu kwalokho, bathola noma isiphi isizathu sokuqalisa ingxabano ngoba bayakwazi ukubona uzungu olubhekiswe kubo kuzo zonke izingxenye zempilo. Ekugcineni, umona wabo ogulayo uzohlala ukwenze umuntu onecala emehlweni abo, noma ngabe uchitha isikhathi sakho esiningi unabo.
Ukufunda: Kungani ukukhala kukwenza uzizwe kamnandi
Umhlanekezeli we-narcissistic
Ngokusho kwesazi somuntu uJean-Edouard Grésy, ungumuntu ocekela phansi kakhulu labo abamzungezile. Imvelaphi yokungakhululeki kwakhe ivela ekuzithembeni okuphansi kakhulu ukuthi anganxephezela ngokubeka abanye phansi.
Uhlala ebonakala ezwelana kakhulu ekuboneni kokuqala, njengoba ekhipha ukubukeka okukhanyayo nokwemvelo ngenxa yobuhlakani obuhle kanye namakhono amahle kakhulu okusebenzelana nabanye.
Okunye kokuziphatha okutshelwayo ukuthi basebenzisa isikhathi sabo ukuhlonipha abanye ngenkathi bezibeka njengeziko lomhlaba, ikakhulukazi omunye wabantu abambalwa emhlabeni ofanelwe ngempela ukuba khona.
Labo ababa ngabathandekayo babo bavame ukuzizwa bethembele kakhulu kubo, njengokungathi laba bangaphambili babebaluleke kuphela kulokho okucatshangwa ukuthi bayabasiza. Ngempela, isikhohlakali esingumlutha siyashintshana, obala nangasese, sidumise futhi sihlambalaze, isisulu saso sizizwe sinecala noma simkweleta.
Omunye wemiphumela emibi kulabo abahlukunyezwayo ukuthi bazithola behlukanisiwe. Ekugcineni, ukuze anelise ukuzazisa kwakhe, umgwenxa we-narcissistic usebenzise abanye ngaphandle kokukhathazeka ngenjabulo yakhe.
Njengoba ukuzethemba nokuzazi ngokwakho kuthonywe kakhulu ukubuka abanye, abakhohlisi be-narcissistic bayingozi enkulu. Ngokwalokhu kubuka, ngincoma ukuthi babaleke ngokushesha okukhulu futhi ngaphandle kokuqubuka.
Engazinzile
Sizibonakalisa ngokulandelana kwezimo ezinhle nezingezona ezingokomzwelo. Ingakwazi ukuxhuma injabulo, injabulo, injabulo bese kuba ukudabuka nosizi esikhathini esifushane kakhulu. Esinye sezibonakaliso zokuqala ze-telltale kungaba inkinga ephindaphindekayo yokugxila, ukunaka kwakhe ukungakwazi ukugxila emsebenzini owodwa.
Imvamisa uyakwazi ukusebenzisa amandla amakhulu kumaphrojekthi ahlukahlukene nalahlukahlukene, ukukubonisa uthando lwakhe ngawe noma izinkanuko zakhe. Kulezi zikhathi siphawula ikhono elimangazayo lokukhuluma ngokushesha okukhulu.
Namanje kulesi simo okuthiwa "sinethemba", uyakwazi ukukhombisa ukuzwelana kwangempela, kepha futhi nokungasebenzi kahle kanye ne-hypersociability ethandwa yisidingo esiphansi sokulala. Kepha ngokushesha okukhulu, lesi sikhathi somusa singaphenduka iphupho elibi lobudlelwano.
Ubuntu obungazinzile bese buyacasuka, bunodlame futhi kwesinye isikhathi kubanda ngendlela engachazeki futhi kungathandeki kuwe. Ngokuphathelene nokuguquguquka kwakhe, kuyanyamalala ngenxa yokunganakwa okuholela ekutheni angasebenzi futhi alale isikhathi eside kakhulu.
Lapho isigaba esibi sesingenile, isimilo esiyingozi esivezwa yizenzo nokungazi (ukusebenzisa imali ngaphandle kokuba nemali edingekayo, ukulutha, ukungacabangi ngemiphumela yezenzo zakho) kungenzeka. Ekugcineni, sizobona ukuthambekela ekubeni nobulili obuchichimayo, okuvame ukuholela ekutheni kungenzeki ukwethembeka, nokuzikhukhumeza okukhulu.
Funda: Ukuba Nomusa Kakhulu Kungaholela Ekucindezelekeni
Isiphetho: izinhlangano ezijwayelekile zobuthi
Ekugcineni, izinhlupheko eziningi zivamile ebudlelwaneni obuhlukene nobuntu obuyingozi. Okokuqala, kubalulekile ukuqaphela ukubaluleka kokuzizwa ngokomzimba. Ubudlelwano obunobuthi budala ukukhathala kwangempela komzimba okuya kokukhathala.
Uma ulahlekelwa amandla akho, isifiso sakho sokudla, isifiso sakho sokuphila noma ukwandisa ukukhathazeka kwakho ebuhlotsheni, udinga ukucabanga kabusha. Okwesibili, ukuzithola uhlukanisiwe ngokomzwelo kuyisibonakaliso esingaze sikhohlise.
Abantu abanobuthi abasoze bayeka ukufuna noma ukubenza bazizwe ukuthi bona bodwa basifanele isikhathi sakho, nokuthi uchitha okwakho ukuxhumana nabo bonke abanye abantu. Lapho-ke umuzwa wecala uhlala ungena ebudlelwaneni obunobuthi.
Impela, uzohlala uzibuza ukuthi ngabe iphutha lakho lizoba yini, mhlawumbe ngoba umuntu onobuthi uzokusola unomphela, noma ngoba uzozizwa unesibopho sesimo esikwenza ungajabuli. Esinye isibonakaliso esinokwethenjelwa ukubona ukubanjwa esingaba nakho phezu kwakho.
Ubuntu obunobuthi ngokuvamile buyakwazi ukudala imizwa engqubuzanayo kuwe, ikwenze ube sengozini, uthobele intando yabo. Ekugcineni, isilinganiso sokuhlonishwa komuntu siqu singubufakazi obuqinisekile.
Singakubona ngesikhathi sokulahlekelwa ukuzethemba okuchazwe umuzwa wokungasakhululeki noma wokungakwazi ukuziqinisa ebudlelwaneni obukhulunywa ngabo.