Ingabe "abesifazane be-phallic" bayindlela yesikhathi sethu?

Khumbula u-Miranda Priestley onamandla onke ku-Devil Wears Prada, ombono wakhe umhlaba wefashini uncike futhi obhubhisa abanye ngaphandle kwesithunzi sokungabaza? Khumbula ugogo onyantisayo othi Ngingcwabe Ngemva Kwebhodi elicindezela umzukulu wakhe ngothando lwakhe oluncisha umoya?

Futhi u-Elena ovela esithombeni segama elifanayo lika-Andrei Zvyagintsev, "ebamba" amadoda akhe - umyeni wakhe nendodana yakhe? Futhi umama ka-Erica ozicabangela yena yedwa ku-The Pianist ka-Michael Haneke? Bonke laba besifazane bangabizwa ngokuthi "phallic" ngama-psychoanalysts asendulo.

Abesifazane abanjalo bane-"phallus", okungukuthi, amandla, amandla. Indlela yabo eyinhloko yokusebenzelana nabanye iwukuqhathanisa nokuncintisana namadoda. UFreud wayekholelwa ukuthi isizathu salokhu kuziphatha siwumona wepipi, lapho owesifazane angakwazi ukuqeda ngezindlela ezimbili kuphela: ukufakazela wonke umuntu ukuthi akabi kakhulu kunamadoda, noma ukubeletha ingane engokomfanekiso esikhundleni somthondo.

I-phallicity ibonakala kanjani kwabesifazane banamuhla? Sibuze lo mbuzo kochwepheshe ababili: i-psychoanalyst uSvetlana Fedorova kanye nomhlaziyi weJungian uLev Khegai. Futhi uthole imibono emibili ehlukene.

“Babheka ukungenzi lutho njengento ehlazisayo”

Svetlana Fedorova, psychoanalyst

“I-phallus ifanekisela amandla, amandla onke. Bobabili abesilisa nabesifazane bayalingeka ukuba basebenzise lawa mandla. Kodwa uma indoda ine-penis ngokwemvelo, khona-ke owesifazane ngesikhathi esithile ubhekana neqiniso lokushoda. Angase abhekane nokungakhululeki kulokhu futhi azame ukunxephezela lokhu kuntuleka ngokuncintisana namadoda.

Owesifazane we-phallic akafuni nje ukususa amandla kumuntu, kodwa futhi ukumthena, ukumncisha amandla. Umuntu angacabanga kalula umama womndeni odelela umyeni wakhe futhi amenze abe yize emehlweni ezingane zakhe - lolu hlobo lwabesifazane lufana kakhulu neqiniso lethu laseRussia.

Akubona ngempela abadelelayo, cha. Zingaba kokubili ezinobuqili futhi ezivumelana nezimo. Kukhona «amakati» abaziphatha ngobumnene nangomusa, anqobe indoda, bese efanele phallicity yakhe, emshiya nomsebenzi othile, isibonelo, ukuze uthole imali.

Isifiso se-narcissistic sokuba namandla wesilisa akusona isici sabo bonke abesifazane. Kungani kuvela? Mhlawumbe ngenxa yokwesaba ukungaqiniseki kwemvelo yowesifazane. Ngenxa yokwenqatshwa kwe-passivity, okubhekwa njengento engcolile, ehlazisayo.

Ngokuvamile, lesi simo sengqondo sowesifazane sidluliselwa entombazaneni ngunina. Angathi: “awukwazi ukwenza uthando nabafana”, “alukho uthando”, “iyadingeka indoda ukuze ilethe imali.” Angase alulaze umamukeli wesifazane wendodakazi yakhe futhi agcizelele ukubaluleka kokuba namandla phezu kwendoda.

Noma ikhulisa intombazane isewumfana futhi idlulisela kuye umuzwa wokuhlazeka ngenxa yokungabi nangqondo kwayo. Intombazane enjalo ayiboni ubufazi bayo njengento ekhangayo, futhi isitho sayo sobulili besifazane njengesithunzi, umthombo wenjabulo nokuphila okusha. Ufuna ukuthwebula yonke into eyisilisa futhi anxephezele ngalokhu kuntuleka.

Esikoleni, intombazane enjalo izoqhudelana nabanye kukho konke, ilwele ukuba yinhle kakhulu, ihlakaniphe kakhulu, inhle kakhulu. Futhi kungenxa yokwehla kwenani labanye. Ukuhlulwa akubekezeleleki kuye.

I-Phallic Women vs Narcissistic Women: Uyini Umehluko?

Abesifazane abangama-Phallic basondelene nohlobo lobuntu be-narcissistic. Bobabili bahlala bezwa ukukhathazeka okudinga ukuminza, ukwesaba ukungabi nalutho okudingeka kugcwaliswe.

Kodwa-ke, kukhona umehluko phakathi kwabo, okuyinto i-psychoanalyst uPaul-Claude Racamier eyakha ngale ndlela: owesifazane we-phallic wenza ngasese nangemva kwezigcawu, akalokothi avule futhi athembeke. Uhlala ekhohlisa "amasekela" abonakala emmele futhi awabona njengamathuluzi. Lokhu «okubambele», isibonelo, kungase kube ingane egulayo egulayo ukuze igcwalise imfuneko efihliwe kamama.

Futhi i-narcissist akafihli noma afihle ingqikithi yakhe. Ubonakala obala, “udliwe ukuziqhenya ngabo bonke ubukhazikhazi bemikhosi yakhe.” Akaqinisekisi intando yakhe ngokusebenzisa «amasekela», kodwa uyagomela.

Isisekelo sokuziphatha kwabo bobabili sifihla ukwesaba okunamandla kakhulu kokuthenwa, ukwesaba ukulahlekelwa amandla, amandla. Kodwa uma ama-narcissists anelisekile abonisa "i-phallus" yabo (imali, isimo, amandla) noma nini lapho kungenzeka khona, ubuntu be-phallic, ngaphezu kwalokhu, baphinde bathene abanye.

Wonke owesifazane obelethe ingane ulingeka ukuba amenze ukuqhubeka kwakhe kwe-narcissistic, "phallus" yakhe. Abantu abaningi bayazi izindaba mayelana nomama abangazange baqaphele okuthile ekuphileni kwabo futhi bafuna ukuthi ingane igcwalise iphupho layo ukuze izitholele umphumela kamuva: "Awulutho ngaphandle kwami, konke kungenxa yami."

Ngendlela, umphakathi wanamuhla ngazo zonke izindlela usekela futhi uhlakulele lezi zimfanelo - ukumunca, ukuba namandla, ukuqinisa, futhi kunzima kakhulu ukwenqaba lokhu.

Okufanele ukwenzele abaseduze kwakho

Indoda ekhetha owesifazane onamandla, onamandla njengomlingani wakhe uvame ukukhangwa lezi zimfanelo. Ngokushesha uthatha isikhundla sokungenzi lutho futhi avumele ukuba asuswe amandla akhe.

Ngokuvamile lolu hlobo lobudlelwano luphinda umlando othile wangaphambilini, njengobudlelwane obuseduze nomama ocindezelayo noma ugogo. Kuphela lapho indoda iqaphela ukuthi ubuhlobo obunjalo obungalingani abuhambisani naye, umsebenzi we-psychotherapeutic ungenzeka.

Umfana, ukuze agqashule ebuhlotsheni be-symbiotic nomama wakhe odonsayo, udinga ukubheka omunye umuntu ozonqamula lokhu kuxhumana. Ngokufanelekile, into enjalo ingaba ubaba, obizwa ukuba adale ibanga phakathi kwendodana nomama.

Kodwa uma umama esevele esuse "phallus" yakhe kubaba, lokhu kuba yinkinga. Kulesi simo, omunye umuntu angenza njengomuntu wesithathu - umqeqeshi, uthisha, umkhulu, noma yimuphi umuntu onegunya okholelwa kuye futhi uzosiza ukubalekela emandleni kanina.

Intombazane kufanele yenze umsebenzi onzima kakhulu. Kubalulekile ukuba athuthukise ubufazi bakhe, futhi kulokhu - ukwamukela unina, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi kubi kangakanani. Ngokuvamile amantombazane athi: “Angisoze ngafana naye.” Kuphela ngemva kokuba bengathola okuthile okukhangayo ebufazaneni bomama futhi bakwamukele, ngeke besazizwa benamahloni ngobufazi babo.

“Owesifazane okhuthele oqhudelana namadoda kuyinto evamile”

U-Lev Khegai, umhlaziyi we-Jungian

“Ukukhuluma ngabesifazane banamuhla ngokweFreud, ngokubona kwami, akulungile kwezombusazwe. Izinkambiso zobulili namuhla zishintshe kakhulu. Ngokwezindinganiso zangaleso sikhathi, owesilisa wayeqondwa ngokucacile njengesebenzayo, futhi owesifazane njengokungathi ungenzi lutho. Futhi esifisweni sabesifazane sokusebenza, ukuncintisana, ukudlala izindima zesilisa ekuphileni, uFreud wabona ukubonakaliswa komona wepipi futhi wakubheka njenge-neurosis.

Siphila enkathini yokunqoba kwabesifazane, futhi isithombe sowesifazane webhizinisi ophumelelayo, owesifazane okhululiwe ozibona emphakathini ngokulingana nendoda, ubonakala namuhla njengento evamile. Ngakho-ke, ngingachaza abesifazane abanjalo ngokusebenzisa ama-archetypes onkulunkulukazi. Okokuqala - u-Arthemisi, uHera noDemeter.

U-Arthemisi: owesifazane osebenza emphakathini

Uzimele futhi uthanda ukuhlala yedwa. Akafuni ukuqala umndeni, kodwa uzimisele ngomsebenzi, futhi ezindaweni zabesilisa ngokwesiko - u-Arthemisi, njengoba wazi, uthanda ukuzingela.

Owesifazane onjalo angazizwa evumelana futhi angaboni izingxabano zangaphakathi. Kodwa uma kuvela ukuthi udinga ukusondelana, kodwa engakwazi ukudala ubudlelwano obuzinzile obugcwele, uma isifiso sakhe sokuncintisana sihlotshaniswa nokungabaza njengowesifazane, ngokwesaba indoda, khona-ke singakhuluma ngezinkinga zobuntu. .

UHera: Umyeni Oholayo Nomndeni

Uphendula umyeni wakhe abe ingane futhi uzixazululela ngokwakhe zonke izinkinga zezomnotho nezezimali. Lesi yisimo saseRussia kakhulu: isibonelo esijwayelekile salowo Hera nguMargarita Pavlovna wefilimu kaMikhail Kozakov iPokrovsky Gates.

Ixhunywe ngokwengxenye ngempi kanye nokungalingani ngokobulili, kodwa ngezindlela eziningi kuyisici sesiko lamaSlavic lilonke, okuyinto, ngokungafani nesiko lama-Patriarchal Germanic, bekulokhu kufana ne-matriarchal.

Enye into ukuthi ezinsukwini zakudala, indoda nomfazi babesahlanganyela imisebenzi: indoda yayiyinhloko yezimali, owesifazane wayephethe ubuhlobo bomndeni, imboni yomzwelo. Wayeyinhloko, wayeyintamo.

Namuhla lezi zindima zihlehlisiwe. Isifiso sowesifazane sokubamba iqhaza ngokulinganayo kuzo zonke izindaba zombhangqwana sesiyinto evamile namuhla. Esimweni esinjalo, ukuncintisana kwabalingani emshadweni kuyoba ngokwemvelo.

Ukungqubuzana kwemibono ehlukene kanye nokufuna ukuvumelana kwakha ubudlelwano. Kodwa-ke, u-Hera uthuthukisa kalula isifiso sokubusa, okumenza abe nomhawu nokulawula, ebona umlingani wakhe njengempahla, njengengxenye yakhe, noma njengomsebenzi noma into. Uma umyeni engenamandla njengoZeus, "uthenwe" ebuhlotsheni obunjalo, isibonelo, angaba umlutha wotshwala noma ongenamandla.

UDemeter: Umama ovikela ngokweqile

Uvikela kakhulu. Ukholelwa ukuthi kufanele anikele ngokuphila kwakhe ngenxa yezingane, azikhohlwe futhi aphazamise ukukhula kwengane, amenze ingane. Akafuni ukuhlukana nendima kamama, ngisho nalapho izingane zikhula, futhi ziphazamisa ngenkuthalo ukuphila kwazo.

Singakhuluma ngokuphulwa lapho isazela somzali sikamama silimaza kokubili ukukhula kwengane kanye nempilo yakhe yomuntu siqu. I-Demeter enhle ivumela ingane ukuba ihlukane naye ngesikhathi futhi ingenabuhlungu.

Ngendlela, ngenxa yesimo sengqondo somphakathi sokuba khona kokuzimela kwabazali nezingane, inkambiso entsha yabazali abahle ibhekwa njengabazali abanjalo abangakhunjulwe, bamane bazi ngothando lwabo.