Okuqukethwe
Izolo nje, ubemgona wagcwala izimbali, ebabaza yonke imisho ayishoyo. Futhi namuhla babanga ukuthi sekuyithuba likabani lokugeza izitsha ngemva kwesidlo sakusihlwa. Isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo uSusan Degges-White sabelana ngezindlela ezinhlanu zokubhekana nokutubeka emshadweni.
Ingabe wake wathandana ekuqaleni? Sabheka umuntu futhi sabona ukuthi uyena yedwa, ukuphila kwakhe konke. Ngezikhathi ezinjalo, abantu baqala ukukholelwa ezinganekwaneni "babephila ngokujabula kuze kube phakade."
Ngeshwa, uthando olujulile alukwazi ukuhlala unomphela. Futhi uma ungasebenzi ebuhlotsheni, ngemva kwesikhashana abalingani bayothola ukulangazelela nokudumazeka kuphela ngenxa yamathemba angagcwaliseki.
1. Zama ukwenza uhlobo oluthile “lwenkonzo” nsuku zonke
Ungavuka ekuseni ngemizuzu eyishumi futhi uphuze itiye noma ikhofi ngesikhathi umlingani wakho evuka. Noma ungenza umbhede wakho njalo ekuseni esikhundleni sokuthola ukuthi yithuba likabani lokuhlanza igumbi lokulala. Uma unesilwane esifuywayo, ungathatha uhambo lwasekuseni nesilwane sakho.
Khetha okuthile okulula ukuthi ukwenze nsuku zonke, ngaphandle kwalokho ngemva kwesikhashana uzoqala ukucasuka futhi ufune ukuthi umlingani wakho ancome imizamo yakho njalo.
2.Dala amasiko akho akhethekile kanye nemikhuba
Amasiko ayingxenye yesiko lomndeni eliyingqayizivele elibalulekile ebudlelwaneni obunempilo besikhathi eside. Kungaba inkomishi yekhofi noma isidlo sasemini sangoMgqibelo. Ngisho nemisebenzi evamile yokunakekela ingane noma isilwane esifuywayo singaphendulwa isiko. Ukuhamba nenja yakho epaki njalo kusihlwa, ukugeza ingane yakho, nokuxoxa indaba ngaphambi kokuyolala kungaba amasiko ajabulisayo kunokuba kube izingxabano.
3. Bonga umlingani wakho kanye ngesonto ngalokho akwenzayo.
Ngisho noma unesikhathi esinzima ebudlelwaneni, ungakhohlwa ukutshela othandekayo wakho ukuthi uyamthanda futhi uyamthanda. Ukusho ngokuzwakalayo ukudumisa nokuqashelwa, awugcini nje ngokujabulisa umlingani wakho, kodwa futhi uzisize ukugcina isimo sengqondo esihle.
Ubuchopho buklanywe ngendlela yokuthi bukhumbule kangcono izehlakalo ezimbi namazwana. Kudingeka imishwana emihlanu eyakhayo noma izehlakalo ukuze kuqedwe umphumela owodwa ongemuhle.
Baxabane bakhuluma kakhulu omunye komunye? Cabanga ngezinto ezinhle azenzile nazishiwo umlingani wakho muva nje. Zikhumbuze ukuthi yiziphi izici ozazisa kakhulu kothandekayo wakho. Manje yisho ngokuzwakalayo.
4. Zama ukujabulisa nokujabulisa umlingani wakho nsuku zonke
Akudingeki ukuthi ube ngusomahlaya osukumayo noma umdlali wevayolini oyi-virtuoso ukuze wenze lokhu. Udinga ukwazi ukuthi umlingani wakho uthanda ini futhi uthola kuhlekisayo. Shintshanisa amahlaya nezithombe ezihlekisayo nomuntu omthandayo usuku lonke. Futhi kusihlwa ningabuka amahlaya noma umbukiso wokuzijabulisa ndawonye, niye ekhonsathini noma emuvi.
Zama ukwabelana ngalokho okuthakazelisayo kuye, hhayi nje kuwe. Uma uthintwa izithombe ezinamakati, futhi othandekayo wakho kusukela ebuntwaneni akakwazi ukuma amakati, akufanele umqede ngezithombe zalezi zilwane ezifuywayo. Uma umlingani wakho encamela ukuchitha ubusuku bakhe edlala i-chess ku-inthanethi, ungagcizeleli ukuthi nibuke imincintiswano yokushibilika kwezingane ndawonye.
5. Ukuxhumana kuyisihluthulelo sobudlelwano obunempilo
Ekuphithizeleni kwansuku zonke, zama ukuthola okungenani imizuzu embalwa ngosuku ukuze ube wedwa. Xoxa ngokwenzeka empilweni yakho, hleka amahlaya. Kunezinkinga ebudlelwaneni, kujwayelekile lokhu. Khumbula ukuthi ubudlelwano kufanele kusetshenzwe kubo, bese kuba nethuba lokuhlala ndawonye ngenjabulo kuze kube phakade.
Mayelana Nochwepheshe: USusan Degges-White unguprofesa wezengqondo eNorthern Illinois University.