Okuqukethwe
Ukwesaba okunamandla kokungabikezeli kwempilo kunciphisa abaningi bethu, kusivimbela ekuthuthukiseni nasekugcwaliseni amaphupho ethu. UDokotela uLisa Rankin uphakamisa ukuthi ngokuqaphela nangokucophelela sisuke ekukhathazekeni siye ekwamukeleni ukungapheleli kwempilo ukuze sibone amathuba avuleka phambi kwethu.
Ukuphila kungabonwa njengendawo yemigodi, i-labyrinth, ezungeze yonke indawo eyingozi. Noma ungakubheka njengomgwaqo obanzi ngolunye usuku oyosisusa ekwesabeni okungalindelekile usiyise ekuzimiseleni ukuthemba ukudalelwa, kusho uLisa Rankin, udokotela nomcwaningi wokusebenzelana kwesayensi, impilo yengqondo nokuthuthuka komuntu. “Sengikhulume nabantu abaningi ngokuthi intuthuko kamoya ibanikezeni. Kwavela ukuthi kulowo nalowo, okubaluleke kakhulu kwakuwuhambo lwakhe lomuntu siqu kusukela ekwesabeni kuya enkululekweni, iphuzu lokugcina lapho ubuhlobo obufanele nokungaziwa, ”kubhala yena.
U-Lisa Rankin uhlukanisa le ndlela ngezigaba ezinhlanu. Incazelo yabo ingathathwa njengohlobo lwemephu olusiza ukubeka umzila olungele wena mathupha - umzila osuka ekwesabeni uye enkululekweni.
1.Ukwesaba okungaziwa kokungaziwa
Ngihlala endaweni yami yokunethezeka futhi ngigwema ukungaqiniseki ngazo zonke izindleko. Okungajwayelekile kubonakala kuyingozi kimi. Angazi nokuthi lokhu kungenza ngingakhululeki kangakanani, futhi ngeke ngisondele endaweni engaziwa. Angizithathi izinyathelo uma umphumela ungalindelekile. Ngichitha amandla amaningi ngigwema ingozi.
Ngiyacabanga: "Kungcono ukuphepha kunokuzisola."
navigation: Zama ukuqaphela ukuthi isifiso sakho sokuqiniseka ngokuphelele siyikhawulela kanjani inkululeko. Zibuze: “Ingabe lokhu kungifanele? Ingabe ngiphephile ngempela uma ngihlala endaweni yami yokunethezeka?
2. Ukwesaba okungaziwa ngokungaziwa
Okungaziwa kubonakala kuyingozi kimi, kodwa ngiyazi kahle ngakho. Ukungaqiniseki kubangela ukukhathazeka, ukukhathazeka nokwesaba kimi. Ngenxa yalokhu, ngizama ukugwema izimo ezinjalo futhi ngizame ukulawula umhlaba wami. Kodwa nakuba ngithanda ukuqiniseka, ngiyabona ukuthi lokhu kungibuyisela emuva. Ngimelana nokungaziwa, kodwa ngiyabona ukuthi i-adventure ayinakwenzeka kulesi simo.
Ngiyacabanga: "Into eyodwa kuphela empilweni ukungaqiniseki kwayo."
navigation: Yiba mnene kuwena, ungazithethisi ngeqiniso lokuthi ukwesaba ukungabikezeli kwempilo kukukhawulela amathuba akho. Usesikhombisile isibindi sakho ngokukuvuma lokhu. Kuphela ngenxa yozwelo olujulile ngawe ungakwazi ukudlulela esigabeni esilandelayo.
3.Emaphethelweni okungaqiniseki
Angazi noma ukungaqiniseki kuyingozi yini, futhi akulula kimina, kodwa angimelani nakho. Okungaziwa akungethusi kangako, kodwa nami angijahile ukuhlangana nakho. Kancane kancane, ngiqala ukuzwa inkululeko eza nokungaqiniseki, futhi ngivumela ilukuluku lokuqapha (nakuba izwi lokwesaba lisazwakala ekhanda lami).
Ngiyacabanga: "Okungaziwa kuyathakazelisa, kodwa nginakho okungikhathazayo."
navigation: Buza. Gcina ingqondo yakho ivulekile. Yiba nelukuluku. Melana nesilingo sokuqhamuka "nesiqiniseko" sokwenziwa ukuze ususe ukungakhululeki osakuzwa lapho ubhekene nokungaziwa. Kulesi sigaba, kunobungozi bokuthi isifiso sakho sokubikezela ukukhohlisa sizokuholela ekwesabeni. Okwamanje, ungavele ume emngceleni wokungaqiniseki futhi, uma kungenzeka, uvikele ukuthula kwakho kwangaphakathi futhi uzenzele induduzo.
4. Ukulingwa kwabangaziwa
Akukhona nje ukuthi angesabi ukungaqiniseki, kodwa futhi ngizwa ukukhanga kwakho. Ngiyaqonda ukuthi zingakanani izinto ezithokozisayo ezizayo - lokho engingakazi okwamanje. Okuwukuphela kwendlela yokwazi ukuthembela kokungaziwa futhi ukuhlole. Ukungaqiniseki nokungaziwa akusangethusi, kodwa kunalokho kuyangincenga. Izinto ezingase zitholwe zingijabulisa kakhulu kunokuqiniseka, futhi ngihileleka kakhulu kule nqubo kangangokuthi ngizifaka engozini yokuba budedengu. Ukungaqiniseki kuyaheha, futhi ngezinye izikhathi ngilahlekelwa ingqondo yami. Ngakho-ke, ngakho konke ukulungela kwami ukuthola okuthile okusha, ngidinga ukukhumbula ingozi yokuba ngakolunye uhlangothi lokungaziwa.
Ngiyacabanga: "Olunye uhlangothi lokwesaba okungaziwa yisiyezi esinamathuba."
navigation: Into esemqoka kulesi sigaba umqondo ovamile. Lapho ukulangazelela okungaziwa kungenakuvinjelwa, kunesilingo sokucwila kukho uvale amehlo. Kodwa lokhu kungaholela enkingeni. Ukungabikho ngokuphelele kokwesaba lapho ubhekene nokungaqiniseki kuwubudedengu. Kulesi sigaba, kubalulekile ukuthatha izinyathelo kokungaziwa, uzibekele imingcele enengqondo, enganqunyelwe ukwesaba, kodwa ngokuhlakanipha nokuqondisisa.
5. Ukuntywila
Angazi, kodwa ngiyethemba. Okungaziwa akungithusi, kodwa futhi akungilingi. Nginengqondo eyanele ngokwanele. Kunezinto eziningi ekuphileni engingafinyeleleki ekuziqondeni, kodwa ngikholelwa ukuthi ukuya kule ndlela kusaphephe ngokwanele. Lapha, kokubili okuhle nokubi kungenzeka kimi. Kunoma yikuphi, ngikholelwa ukuthi yonke into inencazelo, ngisho noma ingakaziwa kimi. Ngakho-ke, ngimane ngivulekele izinto ezintsha futhi ngiyazisa inkululeko enjalo ngaphezu kokunciphisa isiqiniseko.
Ngiyacabanga: "Ukuphela kwendlela yokuzwa ukwehlukahlukana kwempilo ukungena endaweni engaziwa."
navigation: Jabulela! Lesi yisimo esihle kakhulu, kodwa ngeke sisebenze ukuhlala kuso ngaso sonke isikhathi. Kuzothatha umkhuba njalo, ngoba ngezikhathi ezithile sonke «siphonswa» emuva ukwesaba okungaziwa. Zikhumbuze ukuthi uthembele empilweni namandla angabonakali akuqondisa ngezindlela ezibonakala zingaqondakali okwamanje.
“Khumbula ukuthi indlela edlula kulezi zigaba ezinhlanu ayihlali iqondile. Ungajikijelwa emuva noma phambili, futhi ukulahlekelwa noma ukulimala kungaphenduka ukuhlehla, ”kwengeza uLisa Rankin. Ngaphezu kwalokho, ezindaweni ezihlukahlukene zokuphila singaba semazingeni ahlukene. Isibonelo, silingwa ngokungaziwa emsebenzini futhi ngesikhathi esifanayo siyaqaphela ukwesaba kwethu ukushiya indawo yokunethezeka ebuhlotsheni bomuntu siqu. “Ungazahluleli ukuthi ungubani! Asikho isigaba "esilungile" noma "esingalungile" - zithembe futhi uzinike isikhathi sokushintsha.
Kwesinye isikhathi kungasiza kakhulu ukuqonda ukuthi sikuphi, kodwa singahluleli ukuthi yikuphi okunye “esingafaneleki kukho.” Ukumaka okuthi “Ngikhona” kuleli mephu kuzosisiza sihambe endleleni esuka ekwesabeni siye enkululekweni ngejubane lethu. Lokhu kunyakaza akunakwenzeka ngaphandle kozwelo nokuzinakekela. “Themba inqubo ngesineke nangokuzithanda wena. Noma ngabe ukuphi, usuvele usendaweni efanele.”
Mayelana Nombhali: U-Lisa Rankin ungudokotela kanye nombhali odayisa kakhulu wencwadi ethi Healing Fear: Building Courage for a Healthy body, Ingqondo, and Soul, nezinye izincwadi.