Okuqukethwe
Ngezinye izikhathi izinto ezilula zibonakala zingenakwenzeka. Isibonelo, abanye abantu baba novalo noma ukwesaba lapho bedinga ukucela usizo lomunye umuntu. Isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo uJonis Webb ukholelwa ukuthi zimbili izizathu zalokhu kusabela, futhi uzicabangela esebenzisa izibonelo ezimbili zomkhuba wakhe.
USophie wajabula lapho eshintshelwa esikhundleni esisha. Ube nethuba lokusebenzisa ulwazi lokumaketha aluthole ngesikhathi enza izifundo zakhe ze-MBA. Kodwa kakade ngesonto lokuqala lomsebenzi, waqaphela ukuthi wayengenakukwazi ukubhekana nakho konke ngokwakhe. Kukhona okwakufunwa njalo kuye, futhi waqaphela ukuthi wayeludinga kakhulu usizo nokusekelwa komphathi wakhe omusha oseduze. Kodwa esikhundleni sokumchazela isimo, waqhubeka elwa yedwa nezinkinga ezazinqwabelana kakhulu.
UJames wayeselungiselela ukunyakaza. Isonto lonke, nsuku zonke ngemva komsebenzi, wayehlela izinto zakhe emabhokisini. Ekupheleni kwesonto wayesekhathele. Kwase kusondele usuku lokuhamba, kodwa akakwazanga ukucela usizo kunoma yimuphi umngane wakhe.
Wonke umuntu udinga usizo ngezinye izikhathi. Kwabaningi, ukukucela kulula, kodwa kwabanye kuyinkinga enkulu. Abantu abanjalo bazama ukungangeni ezimeni lapho udinga ukubuza abanye. Isizathu salokhu kwesaba isifiso esibuhlungu sokuzimela, ngenxa yokuthi noma yisiphi isidingo sokuthembela komunye umuntu sibangela ukungakhululeki.
Ngokuvamile sikhuluma ngokwesaba kwangempela, ukufinyelela i-phobia. Kuphoqa umuntu ukuthi ahlale e-cocoon, lapho ezizwa ekwazi ukuzimela, kodwa engakwazi ukukhula futhi athuthuke.
Isifiso esibuhlungu sokuzibusa sikuvimbela kanjani ukuba ungaziboni?
1. Kusivimbela ekusebenziseni usizo olutholwa abanye. Ngakho ngokuzenzekelayo sizithola sisesimweni sokulahlekelwa.
2. Usihlukanisa nabanye, sizizwa sodwa.
3. Kusivimbela ekuthuthukiseni ubudlelwano nabanye, ngoba ubudlelwano obugcwele, obujulile phakathi kwabantu bakhelwe ekwesekaneni nasekuthembaneni.
Basikhulisaphi isifiso sokuzimela nganoma yisiphi isizathu, kungani besaba ukuthembela kwabanye?
USophie uneminyaka engu-13. Athi ukushonjalo kunina olele esaba ukuthi uzocasuka uma evuswa. Kodwa akukho okunye angakwenza ngaphandle kokumvusa ukuze asayine imvume yokuthi uSophie ayokhempa nekilasi ngakusasa. USophie ubuka buthule imizuzu embalwa njengoba umama wakhe elele, futhi, engalinge ukumphazamisa, ubuye athi nhwa.
UJames uneminyaka engu-13. Ukhulela emndenini ojabule, okhuthele futhi onothando. Kusukela ekuseni kuze kube kusihlwa kuba nezinkulumo ezingapheli mayelana nezinhlelo zomndeni, imidlalo yebhola ezayo nomsebenzi wesikole. Abazali bakaJames nezingane zakubo abanaso isikhathi sezingxoxo ezinde, ezisuka enhliziyweni, ngakho abazi ukuthi zingaba kanjani. Ngakho-ke, abaqapheli kakhulu imizwa yabo kanye nemizwa nemicabango yangempela yabathandekayo babo.
Kungani uSophie esaba ukuvusa umama wakhe? Mhlawumbe unina uyisidakwa owadakwa walala, futhi lapho evuka, ukusabela kwakhe kungase kube okungalindelekile. Noma mhlawumbe usebenza imisebenzi emibili ukuze ondle umkhaya wakhe, futhi uma uSophie emvusa, ngeke akwazi ukuphumula kahle. Noma mhlawumbe uyagula noma ucindezelekile, futhi uSophie uhlushwa umuzwa wecala ngokucela okuthile kuye.
Imilayezo esiyitholayo njengezingane inomthelela kithi, ngisho noma ingakhulunywanga muntu ngokuqondile.
Ngokuphawulekayo, imininingwane ethile yezimo zomndeni kaSophie ayibalulekile kangako. Kunoma yikuphi, uthatha isifundo esifanayo kulesi simo: ungabahluphi abanye ukuze bahlangabezane nezidingo zabo kanye nezidingo zabo.
Abaningi bangahawukela umndeni wakwaJames. Noma kunjalo, izihlobo zakhe zidlulisela enganeni umyalezo othi: imizwelo nezidingo zakho zimbi. Kudingeka zifihlwe futhi zigwenywe.
Imilayezo esiyitholayo njengezingane inomthelela kithi, ngisho noma ingakhulunywanga muntu ngokuqondile. USophie noJames abazi ukuthi ukuphila kwabo kulawulwa ukwesaba ukuthi ingxenye evamile, enempilo yobuntu babo (izidingo zabo ezingokomzwelo) izodalulwa ngokuzumayo. Bayesaba ukubuza into ethile kubantu ababalulekile kubo, becabanga ukuthi ingase ibathuse. Ukwesaba ukuzizwa ubuthakathaka noma ukugxambukela, noma kubonakale kanjalo kwabanye.
Izinyathelo ezi-4 zokunqoba ukwesaba okukuvimbela ukuthi uthole usizo
1. Vuma ukwesaba kwakho futhi uzwe ukuthi kukuvimbela kanjani ekuvumeleni abanye bakusize futhi bakusekele.
2. Zama ukwamukela ukuthi izidingo nezidingo zakho zijwayelekile ngokuphelele. Ungumuntu futhi wonke umuntu unezidingo. Ungakhohlwa ngabo, ungawathathi njengento engasho lutho.
3. Khumbula ukuthi labo abakukhathalelayo bafuna ukwazi ukuthembela kubo. Bafuna ukuba lapho futhi bakusize, kodwa cishe bacasulwa ukwaliwa kwakho okubangelwa ukwesaba.
4. Zama ukucela usizo ngokukhethekile. Zijwayeze ukuthembela kwabanye.
Mayelana Nombhali: UJonis Webb uyisazi sokusebenza kwengqondo esisemtholampilo kanye nesazi sokusebenza kwengqondo.