Okuqukethwe
Ngenkathi ingane yakho isanda kubuyela esikoleni, umbuzo owodwa kuphela "onenkani" kuwe: ingabe isitholile abangani nezintombi? Emphakathini wethu, ukucatshangelwa futhi uzungezwe abangani kuyinto ebaluleke kakhulu, kuyilapho ngokuphambene, abantu bemvelo egodliwe noma abangabodwa ababonwa kahle. Ngakho-ke, ngokuzenzakalelayo, abazali ngokuvamile bafuna ukwazi ukuthi ingane yabo "inkanyezi" yekhefu, abangani nawo wonke umuntu, ukhululekile futhi "odumile".
Ngenhlanhla, noma ngeshwa, akuyona yonke into ehlala iba kanje. Ezinye izingane azikwazi ukusebenzelana nabanye, noma zihluke kakhulu.
Amasoka ebuntwaneni: umbuzo womlingiswa
Esikhundleni sokucindezela ingane ngokuhlale uyibuza ukuthi usenabo yini abangani, ngaleyo ndlela ukhomba ukuthi “akujwayelekile” ukuthi uma kungenjalo, kuhle ukuzibuza ukuthi “ isitayela somphakathi", mayelana nomlingiswa wakhe. Zinamahloni, zigodliwe, ziyaphupha ... Ezinye izingane zithanda ukudlala zodwa kakhulu, noma ngababili, kunamaqembu, futhi ukhethe ukusebenzisana okuncane kune "umphumela omkhulu". Bakhululeke kakhudlwana ngengane eyodwa noma ezimbili abazaziyo, kunokuba neqembu lonke. Futhi ngemva kwakho konke, ingabe kubi kangako?
Uma ingane yakho inamahloni, ukuqhubeka uyitshela ukuthi kufanele ifinyelele kwabanye ngeke kusize, kunalokho. Okungcono dlala phansi la mahloni, kungani ungamtsheli ukuthi nawe unamahloni (noma elinye ilungu leqembu lakho, into ebalulekile ukuthi akazizwa enesizungu). Futhi vala izigwebo ezingezinhle, ikakhulukazi esidlangalaleni, ngamahloni akhe. Mkhuthaze ukuthi akunqobe, ngezinselele ezincane okuzotuswa kamuva, kuyindlela engenacala futhi eyakhayo.
“Ingane yami ayikaze imenywe ezinsukwini zokuzalwa …” Iseluleko sokuncipha
Ekilasini, izimemo zosuku lokuzalwa ziyageleza… futhi ingane yakho ayikaze izithole. Futhi lokho kuyamdabukisa! Isimo esingelula kuye… U-Angélique Kosinski-Cimelière, udokotela wezengqondo eParis, unikeza iseluleko sakhe ukuze axazulule lesi simo.
>> Sizama ukuthola okwengeziwe, isibonelo kuthisha. Kunjani ngesikhathi sokuphumula: ingabe ingane yethu idlala nabanye? Ingabe uyanqatshwa? Ingabe kukhona okwenzeka ngokukhethekile? Ingabe unamahloni? Uma kunjalo, singamsiza athuthukise ukuzethemba kwakhe. Ube esekhuthazwa ukuthi aveze umbono wakhe. Siyamncoma ngempumelelo yakhe. Simkhuthaza ukuba afinyelele kwabanye, anqume futhi.
>> Sidlalela phansi. Ukuze simqinisekise, siyamchazela ukuthi abazali abakwazi ukumema izingane eziningi kakhulu ngosuku lokuzalwa ngoba kufanele zigadwe futhi zibe nendawo eyanele yokuzamukela. Kodwa lokho akusho ukuthi ozakwabo abamthandi. Nalapha futhi, singaqala esibonelweni sethu: abangani bethu kwesinye isikhathi nabo badla ngaphandle kwethu. Futhi ngezinye izikhathi kuba omunye umngane ongamenyiwe. “Singakwazi futhi ukuhlela umsebenzi omuhle athanda ukuwenza ngalolo suku, njengokuyodla ikhekhe lekhekhe, isibonelo,” kusikisela u-Angélique Kosinski-Cimelière. Noma cela ukumema ofunda naye ubuso nobuso ukuze udale amabhondi aqinile. Angase afise ukummema ngokulandelana. Sibheka eminye imithombo yobungane ngemisebenzi efana ne-judo, ithiyetha, izifundo zokudweba… Bese-ke, simkhumbuza ukuthi abangane bangempela bavame ukwenziwa lapho sikhula.
UDorothée Blancheton
Ungayisiza kanjani ingane yakho ukuba yenze abangane
Kungaba amahloni ngengane ukuba angabeki ubungane ebuntwaneni, ngoba lezi zinendima ebalulekile ekuphileni kwakhe komuntu omdala esikhathini esizayo futhi zingamlethela izinto eziningi.
Kunokuba siphoqelele ingane yakhe ukuba iye ephathini yosuku lokuzalwa uma ingafuni, noma ukuyibhalisa ngaphandle kwentando yayo emsebenzini wangemva kwezifundo, sizoncamela ukuyinikezamema umngane noma ababili ukuthi beze bazodlala ekhaya, endaweni abayijwayele.
Singakwazi, ngokubonisana naye, ukukhetha umsebenzi wangemva kwezifundo eqenjini elincane, njengomdanso, i-judo, ithiyetha… Izixhumanisi ezidalwe lapho azifani nasesikoleni, endaweni egadiwe kakhulu.
Uma enamahloni, ukudlala nengane encane kancane (isibonelo, umakhelwane, umzala noma umzala) kungamsiza ukuba azuze ukuzethemba ezinganeni ezilingana naye, ngokumbeka endaweni “enkulu”.
Okokugcina, uma ingane yakho "ingaphambi kwesikhathi", mbhalise emisebenzini lapho kungenzeka ahlangane nezingane "njengaye". Isibonelo ekilabhini ye-chess uma ethokozela lo mdlalo, isayensi, imisebenzi yezandla enembayo, njll.
Ingane ingase futhi ibe nabangane abambalwa okwesikhashana, ngenxa yokuthutha, usizi noma ubuqhwaga esikoleni. Lalela imizwa yakhe, futhi ungangabazi ukukhuluma nothisha wakhe ukuze nithole izisombululo ndawonye.