Ziqaphele futhi uzitshele ukuthi le mpilo ayisasifanele… Ukuzizwa ucindezelekile noma kunalokho ufuna ukuguqula yonke into ngokuqhuma kwesasasa. Lokhu kubizwa nge-existential crisis. Singakunqoba ngaphandle kokuhlupheka? Ngabe uhlala efika maphakathi nempilo? Ungaphuma kanjani kukho? UPierre-Yves Brissiaud, udokotela wengqondo, usikhanyisela ngale ndaba.

Inkinga ekhona ayenzeki ngokuphazima kweso. Ingena kancane kancane futhi izimpawu kufanele ziqaphele:

• I-malaise evamile.
• Yonke imibuzo ejikelezayo. "Konke kuhamba lapho: umsebenzi, umbhangqwana, impilo yomndeni", kusho uPierre-Yves Brissiaud.
• Izimpawu ezifana nalezo zokucindezeleka: ukukhathala okukhulu, ukulahlekelwa isifiso sokudla, ukucasuka, ukungabi namandla ...
• Ukuphika ukugula kwakhe siqu. “Sizama ukwenza lo muzwa ube ujwayelekile ngokubeka izaba, ikakhulukazi ngokusola abanye. Sizitshela ukuthi inkinga ayiveli kuyena kodwa ivela kozakwethu, abezindaba, umlingani, umndeni, njll. ”, imininingwane ye-psychologist.

Inkinga ekhona ingafaniswa nokutubeka ngenxa yezimpawu zakhona. “Laba bobabili bayahambisana, akulula ukubahlukanisa. Yindaba yeqanda noma yesikhukhukazi. Iyiphi eyafika kuqala? Ukutubeka kubambe, kwase kuqala inkinga ekhona, noma okuhlanekezelwe? ”,kubuza uchwepheshe.

Kwabanye abantu, inkinga ekhona ayizibonakalisi ngendlela efanayo. Behluleka ukucindezeleka, baqala uguquko lwangempela ekuphileni kwabo ngokushintsha imikhuba yabo. “Bayaphuma, beqe umthetho, bazithobe sengathi babuyisa imizwa yobusha. Kuyisithombe se-caricatural esivame ukunikezwa enkingeni ekhona kumafilimu, kodwa kuyiqiniso impela ”, kuphawula uPierre-Yves Brissiaud. Ngemuva kwalokhu kuguquguquka okuncane empeleni kukhona ukugula okujulile umuntu angafuni ukubhekana nakho. “Ngokungafani nabantu abacindezelekile abazama ukubuza imibuzo ngokuphatheka kabi kwabo, bayenqaba ukunikeza incazelo kulesi sigaba sokuhlanya”.

Inkinga ekhona ivame ukwenzeka cishe ibe neminyaka engama-50. Ibizwa nangokuthi inkinga yenkathi yokuphila kwasemini. Ngokusho kukaJung, kulesi sikhathi sethu isidingo soshintsho singahle sihambisane nenqubo yomuntu ngamunye. Lo mzuzu lapho umuntu eseqedile ekugcineni, ubheka ukuthi kuphelele ngoba useyazi ukuthi yini eyinhloko yangaphakathi yakhe. Inqubo yokuzikhethela idinga ukuqashelwa, okungukuthi, ukuzibheka ngaphakathi kuwe. “Lapha kulapho imibuzo emikhulu ekhona iphakama khona 'Ngabe ngenze izinqumo ezifanele empilweni yami?', 'Ingabe ukukhetha kwami ​​kuye kwathonywa', 'Ingabe bengilokhu ngikhululekile' ”, ubala udokotela wengqondo.

Eminyakeni edlule, sizwe okuningi nangaphezulu ngenkinga ekhona kwezinye izikhathi zokuphila. Ngabe inkinga ye-XNUMX-something noma inkinga ye-midlife ikhuluma nawe? “Umphakathi wethu uyashintsha. Ezinye izimpawu zendawo nemikhuba yokudlula iye yanyakaziswa. Inkinga wukuthi asibanga naso isikhathi sokwenza amasiko amasha. Imibuzo ekhona ingaphakama namhlanje namuhla ngezizathu ezahlukahlukene: umndeni wenuzi awuseyona imodeli yomndeni kuphela, imibhangqwana ihlukana kalula, intsha ihlala isikhathi eside yentsha… ”, kuphawula uPierre-Yves Brissiaud.

Ngakho-ke, lapho kuqala iminyaka engu-30, abanye abantu bazizwa sengathi sekuyisikhathi sokuba ekugcineni babe abantu abadala. Futhi bakuthola njengesithiyo ngoba bayi-nostalgic yokunganaki kweminyaka yabo yamashumi amabili. Njengokungathi bafuna ukunweba isikhathi sabo sobusha isikhathi eside ngangokunokwenzeka. Abangashadile besaba umqondo wokungamtholi umuntu abazohlanganyela naye impilo yabo, abantu abambalwa abasenakulinganisela imibhangqwana, izwe lebhizinisi liyabadumaza noma libesabise, izingqinamba ezibonakalayo ziyanda…

Inkinga ye-midlife, njengenkinga ye-midlife, inhlekelele ye-midlife. Uma kwenzeka kusenesikhathi, kungenxa yokuthi kungenzeka ukuthi umcimbi ubuwulindele. Njengesibonelo isehlukaniso, ukufika kwengane noma ukulahlekelwa umsebenzi.

Inkinga ekhona ayikwazi ukuphila ngaphandle kokuhlupheka. Yilokhu okusivumela ukuthi siye phambili futhi sinqobe ubunzima. “Ukuhlupheka kusiphoqa ukuba sizibuze, kuyadingeka”, kugcizelela uchwepheshe. Ukuphuma ebunzimeni kudinga ukuzisebenzela. Siqale siqale sibheke ukuthi yini engasasifanele, bese sizibuza ukuthi yini esiyidingayo ukuze sijabule. Lokhu kuhlola kungenziwa yedwa noma ngosizo lomelaphi. 

KuPierre-Yves Brissiaud, kubalulekile, njengesazi sokusebenza kwengqondo, ukwazisa le nkinga. “Inkinga ekhona ayenzeki ngenhlanhla, iwusizo kumuntu obhekene nayo. Ngemuva kokwenza ukuxilongwa, ngisiza iziguli zami zingene ngaphakathi ngokwazo. Kungumsebenzi omude noma omncane, kuya ngabantu. Kodwa lokhu ngokuvamile akuwona umsebenzi olula ngoba siphila emphakathini obukeka ngaphandle lapho sicelwa ukuba Sikwenze kodwa singabikho. Umuntu akasenayo imibono. Kodwa-ke, inkinga ekhona idinga ukuthi sibuyele ezintweni eziyisisekelo, ukubuyisela noma ekugcineni sinikeze injongo yokuphila kwethu ”. Njengoba inkinga ekhona kungukungavumelani phakathi kwalokho okucelwe ukuba sibe yikho nokuthi singobani ngempela, inhloso yokwelashwa ukusiza abantu bathole ukuzwana nobuntu babo bangaphakathi.

Umuntu ngamunye uhlukile, ngakho inkinga ngayinye ekhona ihlukile. Kepha kubonakala sengathi amanye amaphrofayli kungenzeka ukuthi adlule kulesi sigaba. KuPierre-Yves Brissiaud, abantu okuthiwa “bahle ngazo zonke izindlela” futhi abantu abathembeke kakhulu basengozini. Ngandlela thize, bangabafundi abahle abahlale benza yonke into kahle futhi abahlale behlangabezana nokulindelwe abanye. Abazange bafunde ukwenqaba futhi baveze izidingo zabo. Ngaphandle kokuthi ngemva kwesikhashana, liyaqhuma. “Ukungavezi izidingo zakho udlame lokuqala olwenza kuwena”, kuxwayisa udokotela wengqondo.