Ungakwazi ukufihla imizwa yakho ngaphandle kokuqaphela ngokusebenzisa izihlungi zokuxhumana, ezingase zivele ngamagama, ulimi lomzimba, nezenzo. Lapho umngane oseduze ebuza, “Kwenzekeni?” - futhi umomotheka kamnandi bese uthi: "Akukho lutho" - ungazivala emizweni yakho yangempela. Ngakho-ke, ngokuvala umnyango wezwe lakho elingaphakathi, awukwazi ukuzwa impilo ngokugcwele, uqaphele izindinganiso zakho siqu futhi wenze izinqumo ezizokusiza uphile ngokuvumelana nawe.
Ungazishayi indiva uma usebenzisa izihlungi njengendlela yemizwa. Mhlawumbe lena yindlela owenza ngayo uhlobo oluthile lokuzivikela. Izihlungi zingaba isici esibalulekile sokuvikela uma kwenzeka ukulimala noma impendulo esimweni onenkinga naso. Ukuvula nokwenza kusebenze ukuvezwa okugcwele kwemizwa nemizwa yakho lapho ungakakulungeli ngokwengqondo lokhu kungavuselela okuhlangenwe nakho okungajabulisi noma okubuhlungu. Uma ungakalulami ekucindezelekeni oke wabhekana nakho, kungase kungqubuzane nenqubo yokuphulukisa oyidingayo ukuze ube nempilo yangaphakathi egcwele futhi esebenzayo.
Lokhu akusho ukuthi kufanele ube 100% ophile kahle engqondweni noma ujabule nsuku zonke ukuze uphile impilo evamile yangaphakathi nengaphandle. Izihlungi ngokuvamile zingahlanekezela imizwa yakho yangempela futhi ziphazamise ubudlelwano bakho nawe kanye nabanye. Izihlungi eziqaphelayo noma ezinganakile zikhohlisa indlela okhuluma ngayo ngemizwa yakho. Ukhetha lezi zihlungi ngezizathu ezahlukahlukene eziqondakalayo, ezifaka ukwesaba ukungafaneleki, ukuqondakala, noma ukuvele ulimale. Kodwa ekugcineni, izihlungi zithinta ukuxhumana kokubili nabanye kanye nawe. Nazi izihlungi ezimbili ezivame ukusetshenziswa kakhulu, ukuma okuzokusiza ukuthi uvule futhi uzizwe ungcono.
Ukubheka phezulu
Uma ubuza imibuzo ongenasithakazelo ezimpendulo kuyo, uqala ukucabanga ngokukha phezulu. "Kuyabanda lapho?" noma “Ulichithe kanjani iholide lakho?”. Imibuzo efana nalena izibambindawo ezijwayelekile. Uma usuzongena engxoxweni yebhizinisi noma uxoxe nozakwenu, le mibuzo ingase ingabi yingozi kangako. Ngakolunye uhlangothi, cabanga ukubuza umbuzo onokuqonda kakhudlwana nowomuntu siqu okungenzeka ukuthi useyingxenye yendawo yobungcweti. Abantu bangase bakhululeke kakhudlwana, babe nesithakazelo, futhi bahileleke engxoxweni lapho bebuzwa ukuthi indodakazi yabo iqhuba kanjani, banjani umkabo, ngokwesibonelo. Lena yindlela obonisa ngayo isithakazelo sangempela sokuthi laba bantu bangobani ngempela, buyini ubuntu babo kanye nezindawo ezihlukahlukene zokuphila. Futhi wena ngokwakho ungachithi amandla ngenkulumo engenalutho mayelana nokubanda noma iholide.
Khumbula ukuthi ngesikhathi lapho kungekho lutho ongakusho, siqala ukukhuluma ngesimo sezulu? Lesi sihloko akumele sibe umgogodla wengxoxo, ngaphandle uma ukhuluma ngoshintsho olukhulu lwesimo sezulu noma imvula yendawo eshisayo endaweni osanda kuzivakashela wena. Kodwa ebuhlotsheni bomuntu siqu nobuseduze, inkulumo engajulile ingaba yingozi. Zibonisa ukuthi kukhona ukumelana nokwamukela noma ukunikeza ulwazi namandla ezingeni elijulile. Yebo, ngezinye izikhathi lezi zihloko zingaba "ukufudumala" ngaphambi kwengxoxo ejulile neyomuntu siqu, kodwa zibuze umbuzo: yini ebangela lokhu kunquma?
Phindela emuva
Esinye isihlungi noma umkhuba ongazi lutho osetshenziswa abantu abaningi wukuhlehla. Ungakwazi ukuhlehla ezimweni eziningi: emaphusheni akho, kusukela ekuxhumekeni ngokomzwelo, noma ekuxhumaneni okujulile nokungqubuzana okungenzeka. Lapha isihlungi sidala isivikelo kokuthile okucatshangwayo, kungaba isimo esicatshangelwayo esibi noma esihle. Eqinisweni, awazi ukuthi lokho okwenziwayo kuzoba njani uze ungene kukho. Uma uhlehla, uziqhelelanisa nesipiliyoni sempilo, isigaba esithile esizokuyisa endaweni elandelayo, uye kumuntu olandelayo ongahlangana naye futhi ufunde kuye. Futhi okubaluleke kakhulu, lokhu okuhlangenwe nakho okungaphelele kuthinta impilo yakho yangaphakathi.
Uma ususa abantu endaweni yakho siqu, ungase ukhululeke kakhudlwana. Kodwa ungazakhela esakho indawo ephephile (noma indawo yokunethezeka) ukweqa imingcele esazokuvumela ukuba uphile impilo ngokugcwele. Ngokuhlehla ngokuphelele, uziba noma uzama ukuvala imizwelo nezinto ezintsha okufanele zibe sempilweni yakho. Futhi kuyodingeka ubhekane nalaba bantu abafanayo kanye nokuhlangenwe nakho izikhathi eziyishumi ngaphambi kokuba ubamukele.
Ukuxhumana kwangaphakathi kanye ne-kriya yoga kumelana nalezi zihlungi. Ungakhuluma ujule kuwe kanye nabanye abantu, futhi lezi zigigaba ziyakusebenzela, hhayi ngenye indlela. Njengazo zonke izinqubo ze-yoga, zandisa ulwazi lokuthi uhlangabezana kanjani nempilo yakho yangaphandle nengaphakathi.
Umkhuba ojulisa ukuxhumana kwakho nawe kanye nabanye
Khetha umuntu omethembayo ukuzijwayeza ukujulisa ukuxhumana kwakho. Zama ukutshela lo muntu isihloko esithile noma imicabango yakho ekujabulisayo, tshela lapho ufuna ukuqondisa khona amandla noma lapho ucabanga ukuthi la mandla ayaphi. Cela umlingani wakho akulalele ethule imizuzu eyi-10-15 bese usho amagama ambalwa ngesihloko osanda kumbulela sona. Bese ushintsha izindima.
Vula futhi uthembeke kuwe nakwizwe langaphandle futhi uzijwayeze amasu uma uzizwa uqinile futhi uvinjelwe ngaphakathi.