"... Futhi baphila ngokujabula ngemva kwalokho - ngoba abazange baphinde babonane." Kwesinye isikhathi okwenza inganekwane ijabule akukona ukusonteka kwesakhiwo esikulindele. Ukulandela isimo “esivamile”—umshado, umndeni, izingane—kungasilahlekisela kakhulu.
Abazi nakancane ukuzokhala ngomshado wabo. Okubakhathazayo yi-psychosomatics ehlukene, izimbangela zazo ezingatholakali odokotela. “Ngiphathwa yikhanda njalo kusihlwa”, “umhlane wami uqaqamba”, “Ngivuka ekuseni ngamandla, yonke into ifana nenkungu,” “cystitis kabili ngenyanga” — futhi laba ngabesifazane abasebancane, kuphi konke lokhu uvela? Khona-ke kuvela: banobudlelwane, kodwa buvila, buyisicefe, ngaphandle komlilo, ngaphandle kokukhanga. Bese ngicabanga: manje konke sekucacile.
Iba nini imishado? Cishe uzophendula: lapho abantu ababili beqaphela ukuthi abakwazi ukuphila ngaphandle komunye nomunye. Okuxakayo ukuthi, akunjalo ngaso sonke isikhathi. Pho kungani babendawonye? Izimpendulo ezijwayelekile: "sahlangana unyaka nesigamu, kwakudingeka sinqume okuthile", "zazingekho ezinye izinketho, kodwa sasibonakala sizwana ngokujwayelekile", "umama wathi: inqobo nje uma ungakwazi, shada kakade, uyintombazane elungile”, “ngikhathele ukuhlala nabazali , ibingekho imali eyanele yendlu eqashiwe, kodwa sindawonye singakwazi ukuyikhokhela.” Kodwa kungani ungadubuli nomngane? “Futhi uma unentombi, akulula ukuletha insizwa. Futhi onogwaja ababili ... "
Ngokuvamile umshado uphela lapho amandla obuhlobo esephelile noma esezophela. Ayisekho imizwa, kodwa izinhlobo ezahlukene “zokucatshangelwa” ziqala ukusebenza: kuzoba lula kakhulu, sekuyisikhathi, sifanelana, futhi - into edabukisa kakhulu - "akunakwenzeka ukuthi omunye umuntu angifune."
Emphakathini wanamuhla, asisekho isidingo sezomnotho sokushada, kodwa ingqondo yeSoviet isenamandla kakhulu. Ngisho nasemadolobheni amakhulu, abazali abahambisani nokuziphatha "kwamahhala" kwamadodakazi abo, bakholelwa ukuthi bavunyelwe ukuhlala ngokuhlukana nabayeni babo.
"Uzohlala umncane kimi!" - Yeka ukuthi lokhu kushiwo kaningi kangakanani ngokuziqhenya, kodwa lesi yisikhathi sokucabanga!
Futhi abantu abasha abangaphansi kwendawo yokukhosela yabazali - futhi lokhu kusebenza kubo bobabili ubulili - bahlala endaweni engaphansi: kufanele balandele imithetho engabekwanga yibona, bayathethiswa uma befika ekhaya ngemva kwehora elimisiwe, njalonjalo. Kubonakala sengathi ngeke kuthathe eyodwa noma ezimbili, kodwa izizukulwane ezimbalwa ngaphambi kwalolu shintsho.
Futhi manje sibhekene ne-infantilism sekwephuzile kokubili ezinganeni nakubazali: laba bamuva ababoni ukuthi ingane kufanele iphile impilo yayo nokuthi sekuyisikhathi eside ingumuntu omdala. "Uzohlala umncane kimi!" - Yeka ukuthi lokhu kushiwo kaningi kangakanani ngokuziqhenya, kodwa lesi yisikhathi sokucabanga! Umshado kulesi simo uba ukuphela kwendlela yesimo somuntu omdala. Kodwa ngezinye izikhathi kufanele ukhokhe inani eliphezulu lalokhu.
Ngesinye isikhathi owesifazane oneminyaka engu-30 weza kimi ephethe i-migraines enzima, okungekho lutho olwasiza ukuyiqeda. Kwaphela iminyaka emithathu ehlala emshadweni womphakathi nozakwabo. Kwakusabisa ukuhamba: ngakho-ke kwakudingekile ukushintsha imisebenzi, futhi "uyangithanda, ngingakwenza kanjani lokhu kuye", futhi "ngokungazelelwe ngeke ngithole muntu, ngoba angiseyona intombazane ...". Ekugcineni bahlukana, washada nomunye umuntu, futhi i-migraine yanyamalala ngokuzumayo futhi ngaphandle kwesizathu njengoba ibonakala.
Izifo zethu ziwumlayezo womzimba, ukuziphatha kwawo kokubhikisha. Umelene nani? Ngokumelene nokuntuleka kwenjabulo. Uma ingekho ebuhlotsheni, khona-ke ayidingeki, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi singase sibonakale sifanelekile noma sifaneleka kangakanani komunye nomunye noma, nakakhulu, kulabo abasizungezile.