I-Psychology

Ejabule, ebukekayo, e-groovy, le ndoda ikunqobile ekuqaleni. Nakuba "sekuvele kuphelile ...», akafani nhlobo nontanga yakhe abazimisele. Kukhona okuthinta inhliziyo futhi okufana nomfana ngaye. Senihlale naye izinyanga ezimbalwa manje, niyaphila ndawonye, ​​kodwa ezinye zezenzo zakhe … ziyanidida kancane. Isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo uJill Weber sikhuluma ngendlela yokuqonda ukuthi isithandwa sakho siyafana noPeter Pan ongakwazi ukwakha naye umndeni.

1. Kufanele njalo “umhlenge”

Uhlakaza izinto futhi ahlakaze imali: kufanele uqoqe amasokisi endlini yonke futhi ukhokhe izikweletu zakhe. Uma enezinkinga nozakwabo noma abangani (okwenzeka ngaso sonke isikhathi), nguwe, njengoChip noDale, ophuthuma ukuyosiza. Uma umuntu engakabi umuntu omdala, ufunda ukuguqula ngobuchule imisebenzi yakhe kulabo abasondelene naye.

Lokhu kungenzeka ngokungabonakali, kodwa kusafanele ukucabangela ukuthi kungani uvele waba umzanyana kumuntu wakho.

2. Ukukhuluma ngomshado nangezingane kumenza atatazele

Ngemva kwesikhathi esithile, ngokwemvelo uqala ukwenza izinhlelo zekusasa. Kodwa uma uzwakalisa, uyabona ukuthi okhethiwe useqala ukwethuka futhi uzama ukubalekela ingxoxo. Ngokuzayo uvele wenze ihlaya ngokushintsha amanabukeni ezingane. “Lapho sinezingane, ngizokuphathisa lokhu,” kusho wena. Kodwa isithandwa sakho asihlanganyeli namahlaya, ngaphezu kwalokho, sizwa ngokuphuthumayo isidingo sokuhamba nabangani.

Uma ngemva kwezinyanga ezimbalwa ungakathuthuki ekukhulumeni ngekusasa elihlanganyelwe, cishe uhlangabezane ne-«infantil». Ukuziphatha kwakhe akunangqondo: emva kwakho konke, ukukhuluma ngekusasa ngokwakho akusho ukuthi usuvele upende kuze kube umzuzu, futhi akuphoqi lutho. Unelungelo lokuxoxa ngamathemba obudlelwano bakho nozakwenu ukuze nithuthukise inguqulo ehlangene yokuthi ikusasa liyoba njani. Kodwa akuwahehi amadoda asemancane, kodwa kuyawethusa.

3. Nikhononda njalo

Uyabona ukuthi ulokhu umkhuza, kodwa awukwazi ukuyeka. Unomuzwa wokuthi uma ungamkhumbuzi ngemisebenzi yakhe, ngeke enze lutho. Umngane wakho ukwehlisa futhi akudumaze, amazwi akhe awanakwethenjwa. Ngesikhathi esifanayo, njengabazali bezingane ezisanda kweva eshumini nambili, ukukhononda kwenu akusebenzi futhi kuba yisizathu sokumangalelwa: kahle-ke, wena, oyisithukuthezi, uzoyeka nini ukumbona?

4. Uyazigwema izihloko ezibucayi

Lapho ungakhonondi futhi uzama ukuxoxa naye ngesilonda ngomoya ophansi, uyahleka, ashintshe indaba, noma aphendukele ocingweni. Ngaphezu kwakho konke, akathandi ukulwa futhi uzokwenza konke okusemandleni ukuvimbela lokhu ukuthi kungenzeki. Angase abe nomoya omubi noma aphathwe yikhanda. Ngenxa yalokho, lokho okukukhathazayo uzongena ngemuva.

5. Ukhombisa izithakazelo zesikole kanye nezindlela zokuziphatha

Lapho ehlangana nabangane, uziphatha njengomuntu osemusha. Akakwazi nhlobo ukuphuza, akanandaba nokubhema ukhula, uthanda amahlaya asebenzayo namahlaya ngaphansi kwebhande. Ubulima abumshiyi eduze kwakho, futhi unamahloni ngokuthi uya ngokuya usakwazi ukwazisa ukujabula kwakhe.

"UPeter Pans" wanamuhla abazi ukuthi bangayenza kanjani ingxoxo nabesifazane abadala. Banamahloni ngokusondelana kakhulu ngokomzwelo, futhi basebenzisa ukuziphatha okuwubuwula njengesivikelo. Lapho umngane wakho eseyingane, yilapho uba ngumama kaningi futhi uzwa ukungakhululeki kokuthi kulo mbhangqwana uwena wedwa umuntu ocabanga ngendlela enengqondo.

shiya impendulo