Okuqukethwe
Kungase kubonakale sengathi iqiniso lokuthi ukuhleleka kufanele kufundiswe kusukela ebuntwaneni alinakuphikiswa. Kodwa kanjani?
How to explain to a child that your belongings need to be put away? How not to turn the cleaning process into a duty and punishment? healthy-food-near-me.com is looking for answers to these questions from parents and psychologists.
Kunenqwaba yama-stereotypes mayelana nokuba umzali. Okuvame kakhulu, mhlawumbe, "fundisa ngesibonelo!" Yebo yebo! Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi kunjani! Uma izingane zami zifunda, zingibuka ngigijima kusukela ekuseni kuze kube sebusuku ne-mop noma i-vacuum cleaner, bekungenzeka ukuvula inkampani yokuhlanza umndeni.
Okwamanje, ngibukeka njenge-raccoon enemigqa, futhi wonke umkhaya wakithi, njengezintshe, uvale amakhala kugajethi yabo.
Kodwa ake sihlaziye. Ingabe ngempela ufuna izingane zisisize sihlanzeke? Noma kulula kakhulu ukwenza yonke into ngokwakho?
Uma uthanda inketho yesibili, yenze futhi ungakhonondi. Futhi asikho isidingo sokufuna indondo “yokufaneleka kwezempi”. Uma uzimisele ukuletha inketho engu-1 ekuphileni, amathiphu ethu alapha ukuze akusize!
Kulolu daba, akunandaba ukuthi ingane yakho ineminyaka emingaki. Kokubili izingane ezisacathula kanye nentsha ngokufanayo azikwazi ukuzisiza uma kuziwa ekuhlanzeni. Abazi nje ukuthi benzeni. Futhi umsebenzi wethu ukufundisa, ukusikisela. Umthetho oyisisekelo: isikhathi sebhizinisi. Izingane kufanele zibone imisebenzi yokulungisa njengomkhuba ojwayelekile. Wasukuma etafuleni – faka ipuleti emshinini wokuwasha izitsha. Faka ubisi esiqandisini, vala umgqomo wesinkwa.
Naka izinto ezincane. Izingane ezineminyaka engu-7 ubudala ziyakujabulela ukusiza ukusetha itafula. Kodwa ngokwabo "ababoni" ukuthi azikho izinsimbi ezanele noma ama-napkins aphumile. Kufanele sibatshele ukuthi usizo lwabo luyini, yini okufanele yenziwe. Ungathatha isithombe setafula eliphakelwe kahle ngaphambi kwesidlo sakusihlwa. Ngokuzayo, indodakazi ingakwazi "ukuhlola" isithombe: ingabe wonke umuntu unazo izibuko zamanzi? Ingabe likhona ipuleti lesinkwa? njll. Lokhu okwabadala.
Ezinganeni ezisacathula, ukufaka amathoyizi ebhokisini kufanele kube isenzo esivamile. Indlela yokuxubha amazinyo ebusuku noma ukugeza izandla ngaphambi kokudla. Dala ama-algorithms akho futhi unamathele kuwo nengane yakho. Isibonelo, "Ngapenda - ngasusa opende - ngageza izandla zami - ngaya esidlweni sakusihlwa." Noma “Ngaphuma ohambweni - ngaphanyeka ibhantshi lami - ngakhumula izicathulo zami - ngageza izandla zami - ngadla isidlo sakusihlwa." Ekuqaleni, kuzodingeka ulawule zonke izenzo zize zibe ngokuzenzakalela. Khumbuza, khulumela phezulu, ungaphazanyiswa ibhizinisi lakho noma ukukhuluma nocingo. Futhi-ke, udinga ukwenza isiqiniseko sokuthi umntwana ukhululekile ukwenza lezi zenzo.
Ukukhipha amathoyizi, ingane kufanele ivule ilokha yodwa. Namathisela idivaysi yokubamba iminwe emnyango. Namathisela izithombe emabhokisini ukuze umntwana ahlele izinto ngokwezigaba. Lapha - izimoto, laphaya - ama-cubes nokunye. Lungisa amashalofu amathoyizi nezinto endaweni efanele. Lengisa amathawula namahhuku wobude bengane yakho. Kunemibono eminingi ehlakaniphile ku-inthanethi. Isibonelo, indlela yokufundisa ingane ukuthi ingadibanisi izicathulo noma ikhulule inani elifanele lephepha lasendlini yangasese emgqeni. Ungavilaphi ukuchaza ngesineke nokulawula.
Kodwa ukuqapha isimo sezingubo nezicathulo kusengumthwalo wakho. Akufanele neze "ukwazi" ingane yasenkulisa ngomshini wokuwasha. Kodwa konke kunesikhathi sakho. Ngokwesibonelo, indodana eyeve eshumini nambili, ibuya echibini noma endaweni yokuzivocavoca, ingase ilayishe iyodwa umshini futhi iwashe izingubo zayo zemidlalo.
Ungathathi lezi zenzo kalula. Ngisho nentsha iyacasuka lapho abazali beyikhuza ngamaphutha abo futhi “bengayiqapheli” imizamo yabo. Veza ukuvuma kwakho, isibonelo, “Oh! Yebo, usuvele uzilengisile ilondolo kumshini wokubhala! Wenze kahle!" Yazisa ingane ukuthi umsebenzi wayo uye waqashelwa futhi waziswa.
Izingane ezingaphezu kweminyaka emi-3 zingamenywa ukuthi zizodlala ukuhlanza. Kuvele ukuthi kukhona amathani ale midlalo ngaphandle.
"Abafana" - igama lesenzo libhalwe ephepheni: "vacuum", "nisela izimbali" njalonjalo. Uma ingane namanje ingakwazi ukufunda - glue izithombe: "vacuum cleaner", "ukuchelela can". Izingane zikhipha amaqabunga agoqiwe "esikhwameni somlingo" futhi zenze isenzo.
“Ilotho” - umgomo uyafana nowomdlalo wokuchithwa. Uma ingane ineminyaka engaphezu kwengu-7, esikhundleni sesenzo, ungabhala indawo: "ihholo lokungena", "igumbi lakho", "ikhabethe" - ngokusho kohlelo okuvunyelwene ngalo ngaphambili, i-oda lisungulwa endaweni eyamukelwe. . Ukuze kucace, umdwebo ungaxhunywa endaweni. Ingane kufanele yazi ngokucacile ukuthi yini okufanele yenziwe endaweni ngayinye. Isibonelo, ephasishi, faka izihluthulelo ezingwegweni ezikhethekile, faka izikhafu nezigqoko eshalofini noma kubhasikidi, vala izambulela ezomisiwe, susa izikhwama phansi, uhlanze izicathulo, usule phansi noma uvale. Chaza indlela lezi zinyathelo okufanele zenziwe ngayo. Isibonelo, suka phezulu uye phansi njalonjalo.
"Pela". Ingane ime phakathi negumbi, ivale amehlo futhi yelula isandla sayo. Iphotha kancane, iphimisa “ukupela”. Isibonelo, "ubuhle mabube sendlini yami!" Eseshilo okokugcina, uyama aqale ukuhlanza lapho isandla sikhomba khona. Ungaziqambela “izipelingi” ngokwenza imvumelwano negama, igama lethoyizi lakho olithandayo, noma enye into yomuntu siqu. Vula umcabango wakho!
"Izinsuku zesonto". Lolu wuhlobo lwesiko. Usuku ngalunye lunebhizinisi lalo! Yakha imisebenzi emi-5 (ngosuku lwesonto) futhi wenze ingane ikwenze imizuzu emi-5-10 ngesikhathi esinqunyiwe. Ungakwazi ukulenga uhlu eduze kwesimiso sakho sansuku zonke. Isibonelo, "NgoLwesibili - umqoqi wothuli" - udinga ukusula uthuli, "NgoLwesithathu - awaphile amanzi!" – ukuchelela izimbali nokunye.
Cabanga ngesistimu yemiklomelo yomsebenzi ngamunye oqediwe. Sebenzisa iyogathi oyikhonzile, ijusi, noma uswidi. Khumbula ukudumisa nokubonga ingane yakho.
Yebo, umdlalo omude kunayo yonke “Ukuzingela umcebo”. Lokhu kubizwa ngokuthi "ukuhlanza intwasahlobo", ngenxa yalokho ingane ithola, isibonelo, amathikithi e-movie ngempelasonto, incwadi entsha noma imvilophu yephasiwedi ye-wi-fi. Ningavumelana futhi ngenani elithile lemali ephaketheni. Kodwa, njengomthetho, izazi zokusebenza kwengqondo azicebisi ukunciphisa usizo lwasekhaya ebudlelwaneni bempahla-yemali. Kufanele senze okuthile kule mpilo ngoba nje kufanele senze. Noma uyazikhokhela ukuhlanza?
Uma umntwana ezolile, ungamfundela ngenkathi ebeka amathoyizi akhe noma ufake i-disc enezinganekwane. Intsha izothanda umqondo wokuhlanza ngenkathi ilalele umculo. Uma umculo ophezulu ukhathaza amanye amalungu omndeni, ungasebenzisa ama-headphones angenantambo.
Izazi zokusebenza kwengqondo zeluleka ukuba zicacise enganeni ukuthi iyinkosi yezinto zayo. Lokhu kusho ukuthi nguyena onesibopho ngabo. Yilokhu esisitshela kona omama abanolwazi.
U-Alina, iminyaka engu-37:
Lapho indodana yami ineminyaka ephakathi kwengu-4 nengu-6 ubudala, ngangihamba nayo kabili ngesonto ukuze iyoqeqeshwa ekilabhini yethenisi. Ukuqeqeshwa kwenzeka ekuseni kakhulu. Khona-ke “ngaphonsa” indodana yami encane enkulisa, futhi ngaphuthuma emsebenzini mina. Umfana waya tennis ngenjabulo enkulu. Kwangijabulisa lokho. Kodwa kimina ekuseni kuyaphithizela njalo kuyaphithizela. Irakhethi nobhaka oneyunifomu yezemidlalo kwakuhlale kulenga ephasishi kusihlwa. Kodwa kwathi lapho sekwenzekile ukuthi, sesivele sikhuphukela enkundleni yezemidlalo, sathola ... Oh, horror! Ngokuvamile, ubhaka wahlala ekhaya ephasishi! Kwakungasizi ngalutho ukubuyela ekhaya ngesiminyaminya sasekuseni. Futhi siphuthelwe ukuqeqeshwa. Indodana yaze yakhala izinyembezi ngenxa yokukhungatheka. Kodwa. Sesule izinyembezi. Futhi saxoxa. Ngizamile ukumchazela umfana ukuthi wonke umuntu unezinto zakhe. Futhi wonke umuntu kufanele aziphendulele ngezinto zakhe. Indodana yaqaphela ukuthi njengoba idlala ibhola lomphebezo, nayo inesibopho se-racket neyunifomu yezemidlalo. Kusukela lapho, asikaze siphuthelwe ukujima, asikaze sikhohlwe okuthile egunjini lokushintshela noma ekhaya. Leso sigameko saba yisifundo futhi sakhunjulwa, cishe, ukuphila kwami konke.
UVictoria, oneminyaka engama-33:
Nginezingane ezimbili. Indodana ineminyaka engu-9, indodakazi ineminyaka emi-3. Futhi ngakho, sanquma ukuthola inja. Futhi kwaqala! Njengasenkondlweni yezingane: “Futhi yingakho umdlwane wacekela phansi konke obungakwenza!” I-Rocky yethu yadla ifenisha ewupholstered, amathoyizi ezingane abohlokile, yafika ezincwadini. Futhi ngolunye usuku ekuseni sathola ibhuthi yendodakazi yethu eyayidliwe ingxenye. U-Rocky walala naye ekhabetheni. Futhi kwakudingeka silungele ukuya enkulisa! Kwakungenakwenzeka ukuthethisa umdlwane. Wayemncane futhi enothando kakhulu futhi edlala. Besimthanda kakhulu. Futhi-ke emkhandlwini womndeni sanquma: “Umdlwane awunacala. Ongabekanga izinto zakhe ngesikhathi nguye onecala! ” Futhi ukuphila ngandlela-thile kwabuyela esimweni esivamile. Izingane zaqala ukunaka izimpahla zazo, zazifaka kumawodilophu. Ukugcina inja iphephile. Ngisho nomncane wayeka ukujikijela amathoyizi. Izingane zazizizwa zinesibopho ngezinto zazo. Futhi bayeka ukukhala nokukhononda ngenja. Umdlwane, ngendlela, nawo wakhula ngokushesha. Amazinyo ashintsha wayeka ukumosha izinto. Kodwa wasifundisa uku-oda! Nansi indaba.
Ngezikhathi ezithile, kuvela enye ithiyori yemfashini. Futhi ku-inthanethi, izinkulungwane zabalandeli nabagxeki bayabuthana ngokushesha. Ngokombono wethu, akukho lutho olungalungile ngokucabangela kabusha umbono wakho wokuhlanza nokwenza okuthile ngendlela ehlukile kunaleyo owawukwenza ngayo ngaphambili. Lokhu noma leyo ndlela izogxila kuwe - ungathola kuphela ngokuhlola. Ake sibheke amanye amathrendi “asemfashinini”.
UMarla Scilly uthathwa njengomsunguli wesistimu ye-fly lady. “Phansi ngokufuna ukuphelela!” Wamemezela. Nokho, lapho izingane zidlala, ukufuna ukuphelela yikho okuphazamisa kakhulu abazali. Asikho isidingo sokwenza kabusha yonke into ngemva kwengane, ubonise ukushiyeka nokumdikibalisa ekukusizeni endlini. Ingane izuza ulwazi. Lokhu kuyinto eyinhloko. Futhi iqiniso lokuthi kukhona ukuqhakaza kwekhofi enkomishini egeziwe, izinto ezincane ekuphileni!
Esinye seziqubulo zenhlangano ye-Fly Lady sithi: “Imfucumfucu ayikwazi ukuhlelwa, ungayiqeda kuphela.” Ngakho-ke, i-mantra eyinhloko: phonsa izinto ezingadingekile ezingama-27.
“Lapho ngigcwele umoya walesi simiso, ngingena enkulisa futhi ngababaza ngentshiseko:“ Manje, zingane, sinomdlalo omusha! zwe 27! Sidinga ukuqoqa futhi silahle izinto ezingadingekile ezingama-27 ngokushesha okukhulu! ” Ingane endala yangibuka futhi yathi sina: “Kubonakala sengathi umama usefunde udoti futhi!” - kusho u-Valentina.
Ukulahla okuthile (ngisho “nodoti”) kuwumbono omubi enganeni. Izingane ziqala ukuzibona “njengabanikazi” abancane. Ziyinto engavamile ekuqoqweni. Ngakho-ke, izingane ziyanqikaza ukuhlukana ngisho namathoyizi aphukile nobuhlalu obudabukile. Futhi intsha ingalazisa iqoqo lezimoto zezingane noma ilethe inani lezingubo endaweni ewubuwula. Yonke imizamo yokuthumela okuthile emgqonyeni kadoti ibonwa yibona njengokungena endaweni yabo. Kodwa imithetho ingasungulwa futhi kufanele isungulwe. Uma ithoyizi liphukile, udinga ukulilungisa. Mboza incwadi. Dlulisela ubucwebe kuchungechunge olusha. Futhi ubeke umkhawulo ekuhlaseleni kokuthenga "okuhlanya". Lena yindlela esizifundisa ngayo izingane ukonga.
Ohlelweni lwe-“fly lady” kukhona futhi into izingane eziyoyijabulela ngenjabulo. Isibonelo, ukuhlanza i-timer. “Amantombazane ngokwawo amangala lapho ebona ukuthi kungakanani akwazi ukukwenza ngemizuzu eyi-10! - kusho u-Irina, unina kaLena noDasha. - Manje sivula isibali sikhathi njalo kusihlwa ukuze silungise inkulisa, sibeke imidlalo endaweni, siqoqe izikhwama zakusasa futhi sendlule imibhede. Amantombazane ancintisana ukuze abone ukuthi ubani osheshayo. “
Esinye isici esihle salolu hlelo umqondo "wesimiso". Njalo ekuseni noma kusihlwa, wenza izinto ezithile. Ngokwesibonelo, ngaphambi kokuba ulale, lungiselela izingubo zakho zakusasa, uhlanze izicathulo zakho. Futhi-ke ekuseni ngeke kudingeke ukwenze ngokushesha. Ezinganeni, "isimo sengqondo sakusasa" sizozuza kuphela.
Konke emabhokisini! I-Condo Marie System
Isakhamuzi esincane saseJapane, uMari Kondo, sizuze izinhliziyo zamakhosikazi amaningi asekhaya eNtshonalanga Nenkabazwe ngokuzibophezela kwakhe ku-minimalism. Incwadi yakhe ethi Magical Cleaning, Sparks of Joy, and Life – The Exciting Magic of Cleaning isithengiswa kakhulu. Waqhathanisa ukusetshenziswa kabi kwezinsuku zethu nothando nenhlonipho ngayo yonke into ekhaya lakhe. Buza lo mbuzo: “Ingabe uyangijabulisa? Ingabe le nto ingenza ngijabule? ” – futhi uzoqonda uma uyidinga. Kuphela ngesimiso sothando nokuzwana kufanele izinto zize ekhaya lethu.
I-Kondo Mari ifundisa "ukubonga" izinto ezisebenze isikhathi sabo futhi zithumele "eholidini". Vumelana, emehlweni ezingane kubukeka kunobuntu kunokuba nje ukulahle.
Ukuze ugcine ikhaya lakho lihlelekile ngokwendlela ye-Kondo Mari, awudingi ukulungiswa. Akudingeki uthenge inani elingasile leziqukathi, obhasikidi namabhokisi. Ngemva kokugeza noku-ayina, u-Kondo Marie uhlongoza ukubeka izinto ngendlela ekhethekile emabhokisini ezicathulo noma umane "ubeke" emashalofini omgqoko noma ikhabethe. Izinzuzo ngaphezu "kwezitaki" zendabuko zokuwasha zisobala. Zonke izinto zisobala, kulula ukuzithola ngaphandle kokuphazamisa ukuhleleka. Amabhokisi ezicathulo awabizi lutho. "Zingacwengwa" ngokuzihudula ngendwangu, iphepha lesipho noma ukudweba ngombala owuthandayo.
"Iqiniso lokuthi indlela ye-Kondo Marie igxile ezweni lakithi liyangimangaza," kusho uZhanna. - Ngenxa yomsebenzi womyeni wami, ngokuvamile kudingeka sisuke edolobheni siye kwelinye. Sabona ukuthi asifuni ukuthutha ifenisha yethu njalo ngemva kwezinyanga eziyisithupha, futhi akuwenzi umqondo ukuyithenga njalo. Ngakho-ke, saneliswa yilokho esinakho ezindlini esiziqashile. Futhi kwakulapha lapho amabhokisi ezicathulo ayesisiza khona! Indodakazi yethu eneminyaka engu-10 yaze yashaya izandla ngenjabulo lapho ibona izikibha zayo zigoqwe kahle ebhokisini. Wawuthanda lo mbono kangangokuthi wahlela ngokushesha "ikona lakhe" futhi wabeka izinto ngenjabulo. ngithokozile. Akukho lutho olulahlekile, alukhohliwe emakhoneni akude amakhabethe. Sekulula kakhulu ukugcina ukuhleleka nokulungiselela umnyakazo olandelayo. “
Yiqiniso, u-Kondo Marie unamacebiso okungewona wonke umuntu ozowathola ekhululekile. Isibonelo, ungafaki izingubo eziphelelwe yisikhathi ezikhwameni noma emabhokisini. Weluleka ngokugcina zonke izinto ndawonye. Kodwa lapha wonke umuntu uyazinqumela ukuthi yini okufanele ayicabangele nokuthi yini okufanele anqabe.
Ngakho uzifundisa kanjani izingane zakho ukuhlanza? Nazi izinto ezibalulekile ongazithatha:
1. Ukuhlanza kufanele kube yingxenye yenqubo yansuku zonke neyamasonto onke. Enganeni, ukuhlanza akufanele kube "isimangaliso" noma kufanele kwenziwe ngokuvumelana nomoya kamama. Ukuhlanza kuwumkhuba.
2. Yenza uhlu olucacile lwezenzo. Ungayibiza noma yini oyithandayo: "i-algorithm" noma "isimiso". Kodwa ingane kufanele icace mayelana nencazelo nokulandelana kwazo zonke izinkohliso.
3. Ukuhlanza akudingeki kube yisicefe. Ukuthi ukhetha uhlobo lokudlala noma uvele uvule umculo ohlekisayo ngenkathi uhlanza - kuphuma kuwe nengane yakho.
4. Khuthaza. Ungagxeki ngokushiyeka futhi ungaphindi wenzele ingane.
5. Yabelana ngesibopho. Ingane mayizizwe njengomphathi wezinto zayo.
6. Sebenzisa ukuqinisa okuhle. Dumisa futhi ubonge izingane zakho!