Lesi akusona isinqumo esingacabangi, akusona isifiso. Ngemva kokuhlala ndawonye iminyaka eminingi, benikezana cishe ingxenye yesithathu yokuphila kwabo, banquma ukuhamba. Kungani abantu ababili behlukana ngemva kokudlula emlilweni, emanzini nakumapayipi ethusi? Futhi yini ongayenza ukuze lokhu kungenzeki kuwe?
Uma lokhu kwenzeke kumuntu omaziyo noma kuwena, yazi ukuthi awuwedwa. Lokhu kuba umkhuba owandayo emhlabeni. Ngokwesibonelo, isehlukaniso esisodwa kwezine eMelika singaphezu kweminyaka engama-50, futhi amathuba okuthi abantu abaneminyaka yobudala bahlukanise aphindwe kabili kunalokho ababeyikho ngawo-1990.
Kubangani nomndeni, lokhu kuvame ukubamangaza, kodwa sizibona izehlukaniso ezinjalo phakathi kwezikhulu zomphakathi kanye naphakathi kwalabo esesibazi kahle iminyaka eminingi. Kungani lokhu kwenzeka?
1. Aqhela kancane kancane. Inqubo eholela ekuhlukaniseni okuyisiliva ihamba kancane. Konke kwenzeka kancane kancane. Kufana nezitsha ezinganqamuki ongaziwisa futhi, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi uziwisa kanjani, akukho okwenziwa kukho. Kodwa amanye ama-microcracks asele, kukhona amaningi futhi amaningi awo. Bese inani labo liba bucayi, uwisa ipuleti - bese liphahlazeka libe yizicucu. Kunjalo nasebudlelwaneni.
Abaningi balabo abahlukana ekupheleni kwempilo yabo bathi bavele baqhela kudala, bahamba ngezindlela zabo.
Ndaweni ethile ejulile, eduze naphansi impela, kubanda njalo, ukunganeliseki. Ayibonakali kunoma ubani, kodwa ukuthinta kwayo okubandayo kuzwakala yilabo abahlala ndawonye. Lokhu kunganeliseki nokucasuka kancane kungafiphalisa futhi kucekele phansi okubonakala kuqinile phezulu.
Ngokuvamile abesifazane banomuzwa wokuthi banikela kakhulu: ukuyeka imisebenzi yabo, ukungathathi amaholide, nokonga. Futhi kubona kubonakala sengathi ebudlelwaneni abanaye umuntu abathembele kuye. Futhi bona, hhayi amadoda, banquma ukuhamba, sebekhulise izingane.
2. Umehluko weminyaka ubonakala kakhulu. Ngezinye izikhathi iminyaka iqala ukudlala indima, nakuba lapho niqala ukuhlangana, umehluko wawubonakala ungabalulekile. Lesi yisenzakalo esingokwengqondo esaziwayo - umehluko weminyaka eyishumi ubudala obuhlukahlukene ubonakala ungakholeki (ofunda ibanga lokuqala kanye neziqu!), Noma ungasho lutho (intombazane eneminyaka engu-20 ubudala kanye nensizwa eneminyaka engu-30 ubudala ).
45 kanye no-60 bake baba ngama-20 kanye nama-35 kuphela. Manje lezi zinombolo zifanekisela inkinga yempilo yaphakathi nendawo kanye nezimpawu zokuqala zokuguga.
Njalo lapho udlula ebunzimeni, ufuna ukubuyela emuva, lapho yonke into yayijwayele futhi ijwayelekile.
Izikhathi eziningana ezimpilweni zabo, kuchaza uStephen Tatkin, PhD, abantu badlula "ukuthuthukiswa" kwengqondo kanye nezinto eziphilayo zobuchopho. Lokhu kwenzeka eneminyaka engu-15, futhi engu-40.
Ngaso sonke isikhathi lapho uhlangabezana nenhlekelele, ufuna ukubuyela emuva, lapho yonke into yayijwayele futhi ijwayelekile. Ngalesi sizathu, abantu baqala ubudlelwano nabalingani abancane kakhulu kunabo - babasiza ukuthi bahlale elangeni elifudumele lasehlobo kancane.
3. Bazivumela bakhululeke. Ukuba seduze komuntu ofanayo amahora angama-24 ngosuku, izinsuku eziyi-7 ngesonto, siyajwayela futhi sikhule singene komunye nomunye. Kodwa ngezinye izikhathi kuholela eqinisweni lokuthi abantu bayayeka ukuzama.
Usebenza kanzima, ukhulise ibhizinisi lakho, futhi uzuzela umndeni wakho imali, kodwa uyekile ukusebenza kanzima ukuze ube umlingani ocabangelayo nomuntu obukekayo. Uzivumele ukuba uxazulule.
4. Imali ithola inani elihlukile. Umehluko wesitayela sokusebenzisa imali ubonakala kakhudlwana lapho ungase udinge ukonga kakhulu uma izinketho zingebanzi njengoba zinjalo ku-midlife.
5. Ucansi. Njengoba ukhula, izinguquko ze-hormonal zenzeka, futhi lokhu kungathinta indlela umlingani wakho abukeka ekhanga ngayo kuwe. Noma ucansi luyaphela ukuphela kwento ebambe umbhangqwana ndawonye futhi ikugcine ndawonye.
Kwesinye isikhathi umehluko wesimo socansi ubonakala ungasabonakali futhi nekhono lokuzwana liyavela, abashadile bahlala ndawonye njengabangane abakhulu. Ngezinye izikhathi, ngokuphambene nalokho, kwesinye sazo isidingo socansi siyanda ngokuzumayo.
Yini oyidingayo ukuze lokhu kungenzeki kuwe?
1. Yenza ubuhlobo bakho kuqala. Kusho ukuvikela omunye nomunye - phambi kwawo wonke umuntu, futhi ngisho nalapho uwedwa. Yibani uchwepheshe komunye nomunye, nimboze amaqolo. Izingane sezikhulile umsebenzi usuphelile manje senisele nodwa niyiqembu elilodwa.
2. Zinake. Ukuthola isisindo, ukuzinza ekhaya nokugqoka ngesitayela "se-home chic" akusona isisombululo esifanele. Lona umlayezo oya kumlingani wakho wokuthi awusenandaba. Zinakekele wena kanye naye.
3. Qaphela indima yakho ekungabonini kahle. Kodwa ungajahi ukuyeka futhi uvumele umcabango wedivosi. Bheka esibukweni. Uma ubona umuntu oyisicefe, okhathele ekucabangeni, mhlawumbe ingxenye yenkinga ikuwe? Futhi uma kunjalo, yenza isinqumo - ukubuyisela inzalo empilweni yakho. Uhambo olusha - ngisho noma unquma ukukhulisa uhlobo olusha lwekhabe ndawonye - luzodala indaba entsha mayelana nomndeni wakho. Okusha nokuthakazelisayo.
4. Khuluma ngocansi. Umzimba wakho uyashintsha, ubulili bakho buthatha izinhlobo ezahlukene. Ithole ukuthintwa, kusihlwa okuthule ndawonye, ngobumnene nangokumomotheka. Awukwazi ukuphinda ubusuku obudlule benkanuko, kodwa busenawe - ezinkumbulweni.
5. Futhi konke okunye futhi. Xoxisanani ngakho konke. Lena ukuphela kwendlela yokuxazulula izinkinga.